Animal
by BeautyIsHerName
Summary: Here we go again. We do this everytime. I won't be denied by you, the animal inside of you. ECLARE, plus many others : Enjoy!By the way, I don't own Degrassi.
1. I won't be denied by you

"I wish I could run away." Clare said, tears running down her face. Even in her darkest hour, Eli was still captivated by her beauty.

"_She looks like an angel."_ A fallen angel. The moon complimented her features so well: smooth pale skin, clear deep blue eyes. Eli was entranced. She came to him tonight with desperate need to hide. To hide from her parents, to hide from everything weighing down. Eli escorted her to the park.

There they were sitting under a tree, two birds of a feather.

"Are you cold?" Eli asked. _"Why of all people would she come to me?"_ Clare was always the backbone. She had wisdom beyond her years. Now she was here with him. A guy she barely knew, yet had the upmost respect for. She nodded.

"Come here." Without hesitation she was in his arms. Clare didn't know why she came to Eli. Maybe it was because he was the only one who understood her at the moment. He was the only one who reached out to her. Her mysterious lifeline. _"He smells so good."_ She breathed in his scent. A combination of Axe and something woodsy. Eli knew what Clare was doing. He was always observant, when it came to her.

"Why do you want to hold me?"

"Because sometimes a person needs to be held." He kissed her forehead.

"I wish I could make it go away." Eli said. He was usually witty and sarcastic, but he was not a liar. The girl in his arms needed comfort.

"Thank you." Clare was still wondering why she came to Eli. He just popped in her mind. She was glad she followed her instincts because it felt right. She tried to keep her emotions in check but she couldn't.

"I wish I could…kiss you." Eli said. His statement was barely a whisper, but it was there in the open. He couldn't take it back. She didn't stop him either. They both leaned into each other and gave in to one another. Shy and sweet turned into intoxicating and bold. Clare abruptly stopped.

"I gotta go."

"No wait don't….." Eli tried to reach for her hand. It was too late she was running half-way down the street.

* * *

"I don't get it Clare. I mean you two clearly like each other. Why did you run away?" Alli asked.

"Because I can't get caught up again. I can't be used and mistreated, then thrown away." Clare stated as she closed her locker."

"If you're referring to K.C., it's not like him and Jenna are great. Some relationships work. I mean look at me and Drew." Alli said. Clare looked at Alli with denial in her eyes. They were so taken with the conversation, Clare didn't notice Eli walking up to her.

"Why did you run last night. I thought we were….connecting?" Eli asked.

"I….got….caught up in the moment." Clare lied.

"You're lying to yourself." Eli said adamantly.

"There is no such thing as a meaningless kiss, at least not that one. That excuse is B.S."

"Who do you think you are? Since day one you've been barging into my life. Why do you care so much." She argued back. Eli wasn't paying attention to her. Getting her to admit her feelings was like pulling teeth. He chose the direct approach. He grabbed her by the wrists and kissed her. This public display of affection didn't go unnoticed. People stopped and stared, including Alli.

"_Why can't Drew be like this to her?"_ Why can't he look at her like she was the only woman on earth. Why couldn't he talk to her as if was good enough? Why couldn't he touch her like that was the last time he would see her? Sure they made out but all she could feel was lust, no love at all. Why couldn't Drew be like Eli. Why couldn't Drew be like **HIM**. **HE** was only a memory to her. Seeing **him** everyday only tortured her.

Eli and Clare parted. Her cheeks were rosy. She looked adorable. He was trying to catch his breath as well. He started to trace his thumb on her cheeks.

"Don't shut me out. Please?" This was the first time Eli had ever truly opened up to anyone. How could he resist. She was so pure. Her eyes were so innocent.

"I'll try." She half smiled.

"Good." He grabbed her hand, leading to the picnic tables. He was looking at her lifeline. He was so intrigued by her. He couldn't stop himself. She was intrigued by him as well. Being around him made her feel like a child. Life was an adventure. A place filled with wonder and discovery. Could she give that up because of fear?

**Later that Night**

"That was definately some kiss." Alli said biting her lip. She invited Clare to spend the night over. It had been awhile since Alli was the "good friend." Clare deserved better. She was always there for her whenever she needed it. It was her turn to return the favor.

"Yeah. It was. I'm still scared though."

"It's alright to be scared though." Alli said assuring her.

"No! You don't get it. Everywhere I turn, relationships always turn into disaster. Darcy and peter, mom and dad, me and k.c., you and Johnny."

"That's life. People argue. I've learned you can't have your cake and eat it too." Alli said.

"I know people argue but sometimes, boundaries can be crossed and people take advantage of one another." Clare exclaimed.

"Well for one thing, It wasn't Johnny fault completely. I allowed him to treat me that way."

"You still haven't learned your lesson though." Clare said as a matter of factly.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Alli tried to ignore the statement. Alli was settling. She kept hoping Drew would be her everything. Her knight in shining armor. A tear streamed down her face.

"Alli I'm sorry." Clare handed her a tissue.

"No its good. Besides I'm here for you. You need me? How are your parents, if you want to talk about it."

"The arguments are getting… better. I tried talking to Darcy about it, but she isn't in the listening mood."

"That's you Clare…always the strong one." Alli said looking at Clare with admiration in her eyes. She was "the rock."

"Alright girls. Time for bed." Mrs. Bhandari came upstairs to check on the girls.

"Clare if you need anything we are always here." She hugged Clare. As she turned off the lights, Alli hugged her too.

"Night Clare-bear."

"alli shut-up." Both girls laughed hysterically.


	2. Here we go again

"Why do we try to keep ourselves away from the one thing we want the most?" Eli asked Adam.

"…..Because we are scared. Sometimes happiness is at our fingertips and we don't know what to do because we are so used to living in misery." Adam said. Eli smirked; he realized Adam was the perfect person to come to for matters of concealment.

"This has to do with Clare, right?"

"Yeah. I thought I made an impression on her. Guess kissing her didn't…I tried calling last night. She didn't answer."

"Give her some time. I mean do you think she's ready to get to know someone right now. You did said say she has family problems. That's in the back of her mind."

"I like how you think like a girl." Eli smirked. Adam smiled. Being friends with Eli made him believe people weren't ignorant. He could be free from ridicule at least from one person. Hope is found in the most unlikely places.

**Meanwhile**

"Are you feeling better?" Alli asked.

"Yeah. I needed to talk to someone." Clare said calmly.

"I know I haven't been that great of a friend lately, but that's going to change from here on out because you deserve better. I mean, you always put up with my drama." Alli laughed and hugged Clare.

"President Sav….again" the intercom buzzed.

"Not again." Alli said annoyed.

"Today is Build-A-Bear charity. Come to the gym to build bears for the Salvation Army. Class Rep. Dave Turner is in charge." Clare noticed the abrupt change in Alli's posture. The mention of his name was like electricity.

"What?" Alli asked.

"Nothing. I'm going to find Eli. Do you want me to stay?"

"No…go." Alli still couldn't believe **HE** had that affect on her.

* * *

"Eli….hey." Clare smiled.

"Hey."

"I'm sorry I missed your call. I had my phone on silent. I was with Alli. We were talking. I didn't..."

"It's ok. Sometimes we need a distraction though." His green eyes glowed. Clare was entranced. He was like…She didn't know what he was like but something about him called to her.

"I'm sorry for being so consumed. Coffee at the Dot? My treat."

"Sure." Clare grabbed his hand but quickly let go. He stopped and grabbed her hand.

"If you want to hold my hand, just hold it." He smiled.

"Okay." She said shyly. Eli was going to pull her out of her shell because she didn't need to hide. Clare didn't seem to mind either.

* * *

"Hey Drew." Alli tried to hugged him. He slightly brushed her off.

"Do you want to go…"

"You know I can't go anywhere this week. Football season."

"Or maybe Jenna season." He slammed his locker and stormed off. Alli cried. She knew she wasn't happy but she had to deal with the consequences. Be careful what you wish for.

* * *

"So…not only do you have writing skills, but you have mechanic skills as well." Clare joked.

"Yeah. I also have other skills." He pulled her in for another kiss. Clare could never get used to how his lips felt against hers. They were planning on going to the Dot but Morty broke down again. He actually liked this better. He was alone with her. Nobody could get in the way. He found a way of pushing the hood down while laying her on it without breaking the kiss.

"Wow" Clare said gasping for air 10 minutes later.

"Yeah I know. I bet you're glad we didn't walk after all." She smiled and pulled him back in.

* * *

"O here you go." Adam picked up the needle and thread.

"Thanks" Fiona said gently. She had never seen him before. She wondered why. His appearance definitely stuck out to her. His features were gentle and his voice was gentle. Not aggressive.

Adam noticed the sad expression on her face.

"Are you ok?"

"Yeah, great." Fiona said a little too quickly.

"For all those who don't know me, I am Dave Turner, 10th grade Class rep. This charity event was organized to help give comfort to needy children. If anyone has anymore ideas, talk to me. Grab a bear. Stuff it. Make it yours. Thank you for coming.

Alli was waiting patiently outside. Many people were looking at her as if she were lost. She was debating whether or not she should go in. She didn't know if Dave would make a scene.

"_When has he ever made a scene?"_ Alli walked in the gym. Dave automatically noticed her presence but ignored her. She didn't matter anymore to him.

* * *

**Drew: Hey baby. What you doing tonight?**

**Jenna: Nothing much. Got something planned?**

**Drew: Do I? I'll be there at 7**

**Jenna: What about Alli? What would Ms. Priss think?**

**Drew: Don't worry. I will take care of that.**

Drew couldn't help but laugh to himself. Alli was as gullible as a 2 year old. How could someone so smart be so dumb? He had been seeing Jenna for about a month now. He was literally dodging Alli; he would give her pecks on the cheek but that was it. She was so immature, annoying, and clingy. That's not why he started cheating on her though. She was just hot. Alli had no fire; she was just a boring little mouse. He still didn't want to break up with her because she looked good on his arm.

* * *

"Two turkey subs please." Eli said to Peter. After 30 minutes of making out and 20 minutes of working on Morty, he was exhausted and hungry.

"We don't have to get anything. I can just walk home." Clare stated. Eli gave her a questionable look.

"Why do you say that? Eli asked. He was going to break Clare's habit of always trying to care of someone. She needed to be taken care of.

"No I want to do this. I gave you my word." Clare didn't know what to do. She was so used to being the motherly figure. Maybe it was time to let someone else take control.

"Thanks Peter." Clare smiled. Eli wasn't even listening to her. He was too busy looking at her glimmering eyes. He just couldn't get enough of her.

"Eli. You paying attention?"

"Huh,yeah."

"Peter used to date my sister. He really grew to love her. Then she left for Kenya."

"That's really got to suck." He said without thinking. "I didn't mean…"

"No. It does suck. How come people can't be happy together?"

* * *

Alli stayed to help clean up. She was on Student Council after all. She had to make amends for what she did to him. She used him. What goes around comes around, tenfold. She stared at him while his back was turned.

"Dave" She approached him. He continued to pick up trash.

"What?" His voice dripped of venom. His eyes were black as tar.

"I'm sorry."

"Yeah you are."

"Can you at least stop and talk to me?"

"Can you at least treat me like a human being?" Dave retorted.

"I'm trying to apologize."

"No. You are trying to ease your conscience, as always. You are the most selfish, insecure person I know." He belted. His words hurt to the core. She didn't show her emotions.

"Look I know you hate me, but we still have to act professional. We are…."

"Bull." Dave screamed.

* * *

Clare and Eli were both silent riding inside of Morty. Both were contemplating her question. Eli was a very impulsive person. He always followed his instincts. They never steered him wrong. This was the same case. His instincts told him that Clare was different. Her essence was different from any others he met before. As he pulled up in her driveway, Clare put her hand on the handle. She wanted stay but she wanted to leave to. These feelings instantly happened. Who knew green eyes could so much depth in them?

"Twilight must be on again." Eli smirked.

"No…I have to go."

"But do you want to.?" He breathed huskily against her lips. They smelled like strawberries.

"No…but I have to." She rushed out.

"_Clare I can't figure you out."_ He drove away.

* * *

Drew pulled up in Jenna's driveway; she came out the house.

"Hey baby. What do you have planned tonight?"

"Get in and I'll show you." Jenna was elated. She always had her eye on Drew; she would do anything to keep him. She had no sympathy for Alli because she could do what Alli could not. That's what kept him coming back for more.

"The ravine. Why here?"

"I wanna show you off to my friends. Even Alli didn't' get this far." Drew knew that would get her attention. Women were so easy. They all want to be needed and loved. Drew knew every girl wanted to be the special one. Tonight he was gonna give Jenna some loving.

* * *

"Clare I'm broken." Alli said in sadness; she and Clare talked every other night on Skype.

"No you're not. We're both young." Clare tried to soothe her friend.

"You don't get it. Me and Sav. We mess everything up but in different ways. I'm too aggressive yet he's too timid. Either way, we mess things up tremendously." She put her head down.

"My problem is that I keep evaluating the situation. Each time I open myself self, I close myself off again. Two steps forward, one step back." Clare declared.

"I tried to apologize to Dave. He accused me of trying to lift my conscience."

"Were you? Let's be honest. You always treat him like crap. You take him for granted."

"I know I do, but this time I was truly genuine. I can't blame him though."

"Als, I don't get it. If you are unhappy with Drew. Why not break up?"

"Because I…don't want to be alone. At first everything was perfect, a fairytale. Somewhere it changed."

"That actually makes sense, not wanting to be alone. Everyone wants security." Clare agreed.

"Everyone wants that person who gets them." Alli included.

* * *

"Hey Adam. Meet Jenna."

"Hey. Beautiful. Drew can I see you for a minute?" Drew made his way to Adam.

"She's hot. Does Alli know?" Jenna was listening to their conversation. She felt kind of digusted. She was being treated like a piece of meat.

"She suspects."

"Hey babe. Let's talk in the van." Jenna interrupted and guided him away from Adam.

Getting settled in the van, she was wondering if she should tell Drew how she felt. She actually liked him. She saw them having a future together.

"Drew, baby? I need to talk to you."

"About what?" He gave her a quick kiss.

"About us. I want all of you or nothing at all. I have been patient. I want us together."

"I thought you liked this arrangement. You know we both like thrills." Drew was not expecting this from her. He liked her but he was not ready to settle down with one girl just yet. He wanted fun. That's why he chose her because was a thrill, only a rush.

"I can't wait forever. Why can't you breakup with Ms. Priss?

"You know why? She's so weak. She couldn't live without me. She can't function alone." It was a half-lie. He believed he had Alli wrapped around his little finger.

"Well if she does let you go, I will do something about it." Drew smiled. He would love to see both girls fighting over him. Who would be the victor?

"Just give me some time. I will tell her." The two teens started kissing and taking each other's clothes off.


	3. Your just a cannible

Dave was furious at Alli. He wanted to believe her apology so badly. He knew she was lying again. He prided himself in being her guardian angel. He was such a fool. Yet, he wanted to believe her words so badly. Allowing her back into his heart wasn't an option.

"Wesley what are you doing?" Alli asked passing Wesley in the hallway.

"Studying. Connor told me we have a pop quiz."

"Thanks for the heads up." She rushed to her locker to get her notes. She wasn't focusing and bumped into someone.

"Watch where you're going Bhandari." Dave stated.

"We…have a pop quiz today."

"I know. Wesley told me." He answered directly.

* * *

"Why do you like me?" Clare asked out of nowhere.

"Um…A hello would suffice." Eli stared at her intently, closing the trunk of his.

"Why?"

"I don't know. You have a hold on me. I can't get you out of my thoughts."

"You know nothing about me. We just met and yet…"

"It feels like I've known you forever. You're right I don't know you but, I know how your blue eyes glimmer when you're happy. I know how big your heart is. I know how much you like me. Stop fighting it and let me be there for you."

"I don't know how to Eli." He silenced her with his lips.

"Just let me show you." He put his arm around her shoulder and walked her to class graciously.

* * *

"How come every time I run into you, you're always dropping something?" Adam picked up Fiona's pearls in the hallway.

"They were my grandmother's."

"They're really beautiful." Adam said. He did it again. No matter how hard he tried, he could not deny who he really was.

"I think the word is tre' chic. I don't mean to be forward, but would you like to sit with me today…at lunch. I mean…you don't have to I just…"

"No. Sure." Adam smiled.

* * *

"Baby. Not in public remember. We had an agreement." Drew told Jenna.

"I know. Last night keeps playing in my head…I had a great time." Jenna reached her arms around his neck.

"I do aim to please." He kissed her. The janitor's closet wasn't the place she had in mind but beggars can't be choosers. On his way to class, Wesly heard two voices in the closet. He was curious as anyone else would be. He stopped dead in his tracks and listened to the conversation.

"_O my God, this is low even for you Jenna."_

* * *

Dave and she having assigned seats next to eachother didn't help at all. He was making it very clear he wanted nothing to do with her. Little did she know, Dave was on the brink of giving in. Her perfume called to him. What happened to the old Alli? In synchronicity, both turned to look at one another. A look they could not give a name to but they knew both felt whatever it was.

"How was the test?" Clare asked.

"Good."

"Hey wanna eat lunch today with me?" Drew walked up to Alli.

"….why?" She said in apprehension.

"I have not been treating you right. I want to be better. Do better."

"Ok." Alli walked with Drew to the lunchroom. Clare shook her head. _"Alli you will never learn."_

* * *

"Why did you ask me of all people to eat with you? I mean, you're a pretty girl. Why don't you have any friends?" Adam asked.

"These days. I keep to myself. Of course, I have Holly J but I am very selective of who I trust and call friend. Honestly, I'm lacking in communication skills. Me and brother traveled around the world. I was never in a steady place. I don't know how to make friends." Fiona drank her V8 Fusion drink.

"It's easy. Number one, be yourself. Number two, you can't pay off people to hang with you."

"Word sure does travel fast here." Blushing at her behavior towards Holly J.

"Common mistake."

"You're trying to make me feel better. No its not. Have you ever been lonely? No one to talk to. No one who can understand you."

"You have no idea."

"Sometimes it would be good to hang around one person who can tolerate me for at least an hour."

"Fiona I can tolerate you for more than that."Fiona and Adam both blushed.

* * *

"Usually girls are scared of me. They think my humor and clothes are…different." They judge me before they get to know me." Elli was resting his head in her lap. The Zen Garden was so peaceful.

"You are different but in a unique way. You are intellectual, passionate, and determined. That's why I can't stay away from you. No matter how hard I try. You won't let me go." Clare said.

"You look so beautiful when you smile. How are your parents?"

"They are going to a resort for two days."

"So that means we can spend some quality time together. We can get to know each other a little better." He smirked kissing the palm of her hand.

* * *

"Wesley it's not my place to tell her." Dave said.

"You have to. She has to know."

"I'm not her friend anymore." He didn't want to believe that statement as he eyed her sitting at the lunch table by herself. Drew left 10 minutes after getting his food from the lunch line.

"Let's go sit with her." Dave said. He was mad at her, but he wasn't heartless.

"You guys didn't have to …."

"Unlike you, me and Wesley actually have hearts." Even though Dave was mad, she read through it. He cared, that's why he sat with her. For now she would be content and eat her lunch.

* * *

Clare was beaming as she was cleaning up the house. Eli was coming. She wanted everything to look nice, even though he probably wouldn't care. They were so different. She was always on edge, he was so "go with the flow."

_Ding, Dog_

"Hey" she hugged him.

"Glad you grasped the concept." He hugged back. He reluctantly let her go.

"Do you want to watch a movie?"

"Yeah." They both sat on the couch. Eli decided to take the direct approach. He stretched out on the sofa bringing her with him.

"What are you doing?" She said nervously.

"Relax." Eli kissed her head. This wasn't so bad after all.

* * *

Sav and the class reps were having a meeting discussing policies and referendums. He loved being president but it was hard work.

"Sav here is the budget for the power squad." Anya said. Sav couldn't help but stare at her. His love for her was still evident.

"Anya can we talk later?"

"No."

"Anyway Sav you can't use our time to pine for women." Holly J said. Dave realized he and his sister were just alike. Both thought a relationship can be fixed with the word "sorry."

* * *

"That was good." Clare said snuggling up to Eli.

"It was."

"Are you hungry? We have shrimp fried rice and sushi in the fridge."

"Yeah." As she was fixing the food, he snuck behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I'm not really this open with many people. I've lost so many people in my life. I don't know where to turn to." Eli said.

"Why me?" Clare said.

"Because you are like me, waiting for someone who is truly sincere." Eli said; her eyes brightened. Clare wanted to kiss him but she never initiated one before. Eli knew what she wanted but he let her take her time. She leaned in and kissed him bashfully.


	4. You're killing me now

Alli was laying in her bed. For the first time in her life, she took responsibility for actions. She was acting so weak right now. She was not alone, she only thought she was. So much disaster was caused by herself, it only tripled when Drew came into the picture. It was time for an attitude makeover. She had to cut him a loose. She had to realize her full potential. She was rebeling against so many things: Johnny, her parents. All she wanted to do was to be free. Free to love herself as a person. Free to look in the mirror and like the person who stared back at her.

* * *

"So why is a rich girl like you talking to a pauper like me?" Adam asked walking Fiona to class. Of course, they recieved awkward stares. A sophmore in the presence of a senior was unbelievable. Fiona, of course, ate up the attention. She was had gotten used to having all eyes on her since she were little.

"You have a kind spirit. I have not met a boy like you yet." Adam shrugged. He was eventually going to tell her the truth. She seemed very open-minded but he didn't want her to have a heart attack. For once, things were normal for him.

"You are a very curious person Adam." Fiona observed.

"Why do you say that?"

"Because you are always thinking and questioning life." She hugged him as she entered class with bright smile on her face.

* * *

"We're through. I can't do this anymore. It wouldn't be fair to me." Alli marched up to Drew. His face was priceless. His ego was just knocked down. The mighty quarterback being dumped in front of his teammates.

"It's because of someone else, isn't it?" Drew playing his mind games. He always had to manipulate; he always had to control.

"How dare you try to make this my fault. No it's because of you. Get over yourself. Everyone else has." It seemed like a private conversation but it was very public. Everyone in the hall got a first class view of the argument.

"Dang. She got you good." K. C. said.

"You want to leave. Leave. Everyone knows you can't be by yourself. Poor fragile Alli Bhandari."

"That is last time you disrespect me." She walked off. She was on the verge of tears but she stood strong. She didn't cry in his face. She was not as weak as people thought she was. He did have a good point; she had to admit it to herself. She always had to have a man. Maybe she should get herself together before thinking of getting into another relationship.

* * *

"The break-up was epic." Wesley was telling the story to Clare, Eli, and Adam.

"Wow. It's about time." Clare said smiling.

"He was cheating on her with Jenna anyways" Wesley exclaimed.

"How do you know that?"Adam asked.

"I overheard them in the janitor's closet."

"Juicy." Adam said.

"So how are we going to get her and Dave together?" Wesley asked.

"We don't. Just let it happen. But they do need a push." Clare stated.

"I don't know. Dave is still mad at her." Wesley said.

"Is it that obvious?" Eli asked

"Yeah." Adam and Wesley said in unison.

"I just want my friend as happy as I am." Clare looked at Eli.

"Wait. The dance this Friday." Eli recommended.

"Perfect." Clare smiled.

* * *

The Drew and Alli breakup brought joy into his heart; he dare not show it. Refusing to let his hopes get high, he walked into media immersion. Alli was finishing the homework assignment. She knew Dave would be here because he always comes to class early.

"Hey" she said on pins and needles.

"….Hey." He sat down next to her.

"Did you finish the assignment? I just did. Can we compare answers?" Alli asked. She knew she didn't need to. She just wanted to close to him.

"Alli I don't…..sure." He knew she didn't need to see his answers. If anything, he needed to see hers. Was this another one of her games or was she trying to be sincere?

* * *

"Guess who?" Jenna covered his eyes from behind. She was happy Alli and him broke up. Only good things could happen now. He would be hers and she would be his. What more could a girl ask for. She was dating the most popular guy in school who only had eyes for her. She was the prize. It was like a fairytale.

"Get away from me." Drew pushed her away. Jenna was so delusional.

"What. I thought we had something." How could two people build something on lies and deciet. He only considered her as a conquest. Nothing more. He only chose her because he knew he could have her so quickly. What woman could ignore a dominant, charming man who looks at them as if they are the only woman in the world.

"You thought. No. We don't."

"You broke up with Alli to be with me." Jenna said biting her lip to keep her from crying. She had finally mustered up the courage to break up with K.C. He was so devastated but she followed her instincts.

"No. I didn't. The thrill was great but it's over now." Drew walked off casually. Alli was going to pay.

* * *

"Harsh man…" K.C. was changing in the locker room.

"Whatever…we all know she will be back next week. When she comes back. I'm going to make her wish she hadn't broken up with me." Drew said.

"You sound crazy. People break up. Pick up your shattered ego and move on." Zane said.

"Your right, she was easy anyways."

"Says the guy who had Jenna as well." K.C. said. The locker room abruptly stopped. It was as if time stood still. Everyone could hear the hurt in his voice. He was still not over Jenna.

"Look I apologized it was just a kiss." Drew said with frustration. He felt a little guilty towards his teammate, but Jenna could have easily stopped herself. Even though she was the "boyfriend stealer," he was the "girl collector."

"I bet. If you hurt …."

"I won't hurt Alli. I'm just upset." Drew said. K.C. couldn't let Drew hurt one his friends.

* * *

Clare was waiting for Eli to pick her up. He was taking her to his house. She was pretty excited to meet his mom. She was curious as to what she was like. On the way there, he laced his fingers with hers. Ever since they began their relationship, things could have better. She learning to trust again, to open her heart, to take a leap of faith.

"What's your mom like?"

"Quiet, sweet, very soft spoken."

"Eli. You brought company." His mother said joyously. His mother was so beautiful. Her long black tresses looked like silk. Her skin was so pale.

"Come in. You must be Clare. Eli has said so much about you."

"Mom." He blushed.

"Don't worry baby. I'll let you two talk while I get dinner prepared.

Eli closed the door off to his room.

"Told you she was nice."

"Yeah she is." She was looking around his room. Of course, Ramones posters and Motly Crue posters galore.

"This picture is cute." Looking at a 3 year Eli was being carried by an older man.

"Yeah. My grandfather. He died a couple of years ago. He was technically the only father I knew. My dad walked out on me and mom when I two."

"I'm sorry." Eli grabbed te picture from her hand, tracing the picture.

"No because when I get married, I'm going to be a better father than he ever was." Clare put her hand on his shoulder.

"You don't always have to protect me. I can protect you too." She pecked him on the cheek.

* * *

"I'm sorry about Drew. I've been so busy that I haven't been there for you." Sav said hugging Alli.

"It's alright. I needed to do it. I feel so much better now. I'm happy." Alli said with contentment.

"Well I'm going to have dance lessons tomorrow in the caf after school. Yes you have to come. It will get your mind off of things."

"Sav you are truly a good guy. Maybe you should ask Anya?"

"No way. I can't help myself now. I dug a ditch I can't get out of. I can help you though."

* * *

"Kids, food's ready. Hope you love chicken alfredo." As Eli and Clare came down, Clare noticed how strong they both were. Having to raise a child by yourself is not easy. Losing someone you love isn't easier. She couldn't imagine what it would be like to tragically lose her parents. Even though Eli never knew his father, he must must have still felt grief. He must of still imagined what it would be like to have the perfect father.

"Yes. Thanks Ms. Goldsworthy." Clare helped setting the table.

"No problem. I'm glad he has met someone who is nice."

"I have Adam mom."

"I know dear but he ….has his own problems." Clare caught the look she gave to her son.

"This is really good." Clare complimented.

"Thanks, it's Eli's favorite. I got the recipe from his grandfather."

"I'm sorry about his passing." Clare sighed.

"No. It's ok. I miss him so much though." His mom said.

* * *

"The park is lovely today." Fiona commented. Fiona was enjoying the scenery. It was rare how simple things can bring you great pleasure. The city never like this. Despite the noise, she still felt alone...a void that could not be filled.

"Yeah. Porcelina seems to like it too." Adam commented. Was this girl so desperate for friendship that she had to buy a pig? Both teens were searching for the same thing, acceptance. Fiona's angelic voice snapped him out of his reverie.

"Thank you for walking with me. It's rare to have a real friend."

"No problem. I don't have many friends either." Adam lowered his head.

"Well, you know what they say. Birds of a feather flock together." Fiona kissed his cheek.

* * *

As Clare and Eli cleaned the dishes. Eli was stealing glances at her.

"You know it's rude to stare." Clare stated.

"I can look at you if I want to." Eli teased.

"I hope I didn't make her mad."

"No. She has come to grips with it. He died of a heart attack. It was all of a sudden." Clare wiped her hands and hugged him. He needed comfort as well.


	5. I want some more

"I had fun last night." Clare said.

"Maybe one day I could meet your family." Eli said a question in voice.

"Hopefully. They're coming back today. I hope everything's good between them."

"Clare I know they are your parents but…this is their problem."

"I know."

"I just don't want you to stress yourself out." His eyes glowed with concern.

"Awwww you really care." She kissed him on the cheek.

"I more than just care I …."

"Pres Sav. Come tonight for Salsa Dance lesson in the music room. Have a nice day."

Clare was waiting. She knew what he was about to say.

"I better get to class." Eli said. Her face frowned in dissapointment.

"Wait. I…I…nevermind." How could she be so stupid? She should have told him how she felt. He needed to know.

* * *

How could she allow herself to be deceived like this? Drew played her. He didn't even care. Alli and Clare always won, whether trying or not. At her last school she was irresistible. No girl could complete; no boy could tame himself. Jenna felt so used. She was truly cursed. Now she was crying in the bathroom stall. How could one conversation at a football retreat lead to this?

* * *

"Do you guys want to come to my house tonight and play Risk?" Connor asked innocently. Alli smiled at him. He was so adorable.

"Sorry. Student Council." Dave and Alli said in unison.

"O. Ok. Some other time then."

"You could have chosen not to come." Alli whispered while Mrs. Oh talked.

"Why do you say that?"

"At least you don't have a brother making you come." She shook her head in annoyment.

"Sounds like he's concerned to me."

"Yeah he wants to take my mind off of things." Dave smiled to himself. She looked so cute when she was annoyed.

* * *

"Guess what?" Clare playfully ate a carrot.

"What?" Alli took a bite of her pizza.

"I am hooking you and Dave up." The instant mention made Alli choke. "Are you Ok?"

"Why would you do that? It's obvious I screwed up. I'm grateful he's talking to me now."

"Because I want you happy. Even when you were with Drew you knew he couldn't make you happy. You refused to give in though."

"Clare please stay out of this."

"Ok for you I will." Clare said relunctantly.

"Are you and Eli going to the Salsa lessons?"

"We may swing by." Clare laughed.

* * *

"Okay students gather around." Anya said?

"Where is Mr. Santiago?"Sav asked surprised to see Anya.

"He had to tend a prior engagement. I am one of the student instructors at "Santiago Salsa."

"I didn't know you danced?"

"Sav…not now." She said cutting him off. The whole gym was aware of the tension between the two. Her facial expressions made it clear that was not really happy to be there. Dave related from personal experience; so did Alli. While Anya was getting everything set up, Eli tried to give Sav some advice.

"Sav, if you love her, tell her."

"I've done this before. It's over."

"If she's worth, who cares what anyone else thinks."

"Ok everyone. Salsa is a dance of pleasure, passion, and fire. It's fast and upbeat. Dave come up and be my partner. Everyone watch what I am doing. Move your hips to the beat. As your partner goes forward, you go backwards. Ladies, let the men lead. You step backwards with your right leg; guys you step forward with your left."

"I don't know how to salsa Anya."

"Don't worry babe. You're a natural." As the music played everyone watched as danced. Anya was incredible. Sav couldn't take his eyes off of her. Never had he been more attracted to her. he honestly missed her but he knew he didn't deserve another chance. He deserved to be miserable, while she deserved all the happiness in the world.

"Thanks sweetie." Anya kissed Dave on the cheek. Ever since he gave her flowers after the mention of the "miscarriage," she had a soft spot for him.

"So how are you holding up?" Holly J asked Sav.

"I'm fine. Just leave enough room between us so I won't step on your feet." Holly J laughed and rolled her eyes. Being in a compromising position only made them more aware of how they acted around eachother. Anya was helping the others get hang of the dance, but she happened to notice the two. The look he had in his eyes said it all.

* * *

"Thanks for the ice cream, Adam." Fiona smiled. Adam was blown away. This girl was everything he was not used to: sophisticated, intellectual, gorgeous. He was in a daze.

"O, yeah. Your welcome. I'm going to let you get used to someone treating you right." Fiona's whole expression changed. Had he hit a nerve?

"I didn't mean to…"

"No it's ok. I have to talk about it sooner or later. Why not be with you? I came back to Degrassi to run away. I had to. Vanderbilt was so much pressure, like a weight I couldn't carry anymore. Being a Coyne is never easy. It comes with a distinct reputation; I name I have to uphold. Connections are a given, like my ex Bobby."

"I'm sorry. You don't have to say anything else."

"No I want to… He was not a good experience." She shook her head remembering. Adam put his arm around her. "Everyday I still see him. I see the black eyes, bruises he gave me." Tears were raining down her face. Adam didn't know what to do, so he followed his heart. Tilting her chin up, he looked into her grey eyes and kissed her.

"Do you see him now?"

* * *

"You want to sneak away?" Eli asked spinning Clare.

"Yeah but I promised Alli I would come."

"We did come, I want you all to myself now." Eli smirked; Clare blushed.

"Ok let me go tell her."Clare made her way to Alli, who was watching but not participating.

"What's the matter." Clare observed.

"Nothing. I'm so happy for you and Eli." Ali put on a fake smile.

"Alli, please stop. Yes I am happy, but you can too. The right guy is probably under your nose."

"Or underneath Marisol's nose." Alli spotting Dave flirting with her. The way they moved together was uncanny. Clare did the bravest thing she could ever do. She grabbed Alli's hand, marching straight to Dave.

"Um, excuse us Marisol. Dave, Alli needs your help."

"She could get help from Anya." Marisol folded her arms.

"Not when she is busy." Clare stated.

"Whatever. Many fish in the sea." Marisol stormed off.

"See you two later." Clared grabbed Eli's hand.

* * *

"_Am I supposed to be this happy."_ Clare was walking with Eli, fingers laced. Eli could tell she was having a private conversation with herself.

"_After K.C. I thought no one could ever be attracted to me. I thought everyone would continue to see me as bland, just there."_Eli ws everything she was not supposed to be attracted to. How could the good Christian girl like the epitome of Goth. He was mysterious, dark, sexy, spontaneous…cute. He was cocky;he knew of his effect on her.

Eli guided her to the park. It was like the park was their "perfect getaway." The wind blew perfectly through Clare's hair. Her smile was something he made a mental note of to himself.

"What are you thinking of?" Eli made her straddle his lap as he leaned up against the shady tree.

"You. Am I supposed to be this happy Eli? I mean…my parents are getting better, but the'yre still on shaky ground. Meanwhile, me and you…."

"Are happier than we've ever been before." Eli finished.

"Yeah." He leaned up and kissed her, gently sucking on her bottom lip. She began to moan as he slipped his tongue in. He was clearly more experienced than she was. Eli didn't mind; having her this close to him was a reward enough. Both minds were blended together, thinking only of the other. Clare didn't realize she was trying to take off his shirt until he stopped her.

"Clare." Eli pulled her way.

"I'm sorry... I...I... didn't realize what I was doing." Clare blushed.

"It's ok."

* * *

"Alli, Dave…in order to dance, you have to close this big Christian gap." Anya pushed them closer. Both were relishing this moment. This was the closest they were ever going to get. They both felt so awkward.

"You guys also have to look in eachother's eyes." Anya instructed. As if it wasn't bad enough. Alli almost went weak in the knees. How did he know how to make her melt? What was the class clown's secret? Alli gave him a quick peck on the lips. Dave instantly released her. They didn't realize Anya was still watching them.

"Ok people. Thank you for coming to out today. I had a blast. I hope to be doing this again." Anya gathered her things, watching as the students left. She knew Sav like Holly J. How could he not. She was Holly J: headstrong, independent, graceful. How could any man resist? She felt so stupid, one year and half relationship down the drain.

"Let me help you with your stuff." Sav volunteered.

"Why don't you go help Holly J." Anya emphasized. Sav stopped dead in his tracks. He couldn't deny it, but he couldn't deny Anya either. She was the love of his life. He was lonely without her. Holly J still didn't fill the void. All he could do was stand there.

"She knows doesn't she?" Holly J looked at his expression.

"Yeah. We are broken up though. There is nothing she can do about it." Sav declared.

"Let's finish this… meeting… in the other room. Dave you have clean up duty."

"Déjà vu" Alli joked;he smiled. "I'm sorry about earlier. I didn't know what came over me."

"It's o.k. Just forget it ever happened. I just wanted to apologize to you." Dave said.

"Why, you didn't…"

"When someone apologizes, you don't continue to throw their mistakes in their face. As I said before, we make a great team." They did their handshake.

* * *

Drew really missed Alli. He didn't realize it until now. Her bubbliness, giddy personality was what he grew accustomed to. In the beginning he did like her, but he still needed excitement. He lived to make girls grovel at his feet. Alli was the first girl who made him work. How could he jeopardize a great relationship for lust? He had to make things right.


	6. We play pretend

"Joyce, I can't pretend anymore. We are not happy." Charles exclaimed." Clare's parents vacation was an emotional disaster. If anything, it brought them further apart. The constant bickering was finally took its' toll on them. He was battling a war he could not win. He had no more fight in him left.

"Correction…you are not happy. I want us to work. We have two daughters for Christ sakes, Charles." She was so stubborn. That was what had attracted him to her. He use to love how she never gave up.

"Don't you think I know that, Joyce!"

"Then you should also know the pain it will cause them to see us going through a divorce. Clare finally got her confidence back. Darcy is achieving so much in Kenya. Maybe we should try harder." Joyce still loved her husband. He was everything she had known. How could someone throw away twenty years of marriage?

"How can we? We slept in separate beds on our getaway." Charles concluded. "I haven't touched you in years."

* * *

"So my lady, will you do me the honors of being my date tonight." Eli teased.

"Of course, handsome sir." Clare curtsied.

"Awww. How cute." Alli teased.

"Are you coming tonight?" Eli put his arm around both girls.

"I'm going with Dave…just as friends you guys." Alli reassured.

"I heard you two kissed." Eli smirked.

"That was a momentary lapse of...environment." Alli said.

"More like a momentary lapse of love." Clare teased.

* * *

Jenna played her guitar in the music room. She had to find a healthy outlet to let her frustrations out. It wasn't enough though. She missed Drew. She knew she was wrong for hurting K.C. The more he hung out with Bianca and Fitz, the more unstable he became. His who being changed. Drew was there for her when she needed someone to listen to her problems. Drew would occasionally flirt with her. She set boundaries, but her loniness made her become vulnerable. K.C. would never make time for her so she searched for affection. The affection just happened to be her ex-friend's boyfriend. Speak of the devil.

"Hey Jenna." Drew walked in. She continued to ignore him.

"I am sorry for the way I treated you. You are a beautiful girl. You should get the best out of life. That is why I am asking you to forgive me and go to the dance with me."

"Really." Jenna's eyes watered. He knew she would take the bait. It is amazing how girls have the ability to see what they want to see. They loved living in denial.

"Please say yes." Drew acted.

"Ok." Jenna kissed him on the cheek.

_" How pathetic." _Drew shook his head arrogantly.

* * *

"So who are you going to the dance with H.J?" Fiona asked.

"I guess it's me and you, bestie. No one has asked me." She stated.

"Not even Sav. Wow. By the way I'm going with Adam."

"A tenner?" Holly J almost chocked on her latte laughing.

"Adam is sweet and kind. I like how he cares about me. I like how I feel when I am around him." Fiona blushed remembering the kiss. It was the exact opposite of Bobby's. It was slow and tender, not hard and rough. She hoped she could feel his lips again.

"Well then age is nothing but a number." Holly J said with defeat walking to French class.

* * *

Drew and Jenna were walking through the hallway. Alli was still hurt; not because of Drew but because of what he put her though. How could love notes everyday turn into avoidance and cheating? How could she turn down a great guy for someone like him. **It was like trading a porshe for a bus pass.**

* * *

"You look beautiful Alli." Sav said.

"Are you giving me a compliment?" She stuck out her tongue. She wasn't wearing anything fancy, just a yellow strapless dress that showed her figure. She even straightened her hair. As they drove to school, Alli had to ask

"What's up with you and Holly J? By the way, I am your sister."

"We are acquaintances." Sav beat around the bush.

"Casual…friends with benefits." Alli stated. "Sav, how could you? Anya. Hello."

"Me and her are done. I can't give her what she needs. At least with H.J. I don't have strings."

"I am not judging you but I would rather have love than no strings any day."

"Here comes Ms. Strings, now." Alli hopped out of the truck as they arrived. Holly J waited till Alli walk in to give Sav a kiss. Even though they were casual, she did have feelings for him. Anya was right. Sav was indescribable: smart, funny,wholesome. Why didn't she see this before?

* * *

Dave was setting up drinks in the gym. He was so nervous. He knew him and Alli were friends but couldn't stop his feelings. He knew he was going to always be second to Drew. It's high school. Who would you choose, the quarterback or the loser. She said it herself. He was so into his thoughts he didn't realize Alli was speaking to him. When he lifted his head, He was star stuck. She was beautiful. Alli noticed this and started to bite her lip. She liked being around Dave. Out of nowhere she had the impulse to grab him and hug her close to him. Dave was taken aback by this sort of affection. He kissed her forehead. Her skin was so smooth. His lips were so soft.

"Dave I think I.."

"Ally help blow up these balloons." Holly J interrupted.

"Sure." Alli was still looking at Dave. What was happening to her?

* * *

Adam was looking in the mirror at himself/herself. Who was he kidding. Fiona liked the idea of him rather than who he really was. Could he blame her? Adam didn't really like who he was. He was constantly hiding from the world. Fiona needed the real thing, not an imitation. He was going to show up at the dance tonight because he had that much respect for her. Fiona was not like any other girl he had known before.

* * *

Drew arrived at the dance early; he knew Alli would be there. He gave some story to Jenna about him not being able to pick her up. He had to make things right with her. She was sitting at the table accepting tickets.

"Can I talk to you alone." Drew begged.

"go. I can take care of it." Anya insisted. Drew guided her to the picnic tables.

"I really miss you Alli. Jenna is nothing like you. I was wrong. Take me back."

"Drew if everything was so great in our relationship in the first place, you wouldn't have needed to cheat in the first place."

"But everything was great for the first couple of months." Drew pleaded.

"Yeah. It was. The kisses, late night phone calls, flowers; but you still reverted back to your old ways. You are not worth it. Goodbye Drew."

* * *

Jenna saw the whole scene. How could Drew do this to her again? How could she even be so immature to think that it was Alli's fault. It was hers. The boyfriend stealer finally gets burned. The tables have turned. And here she was looking in the background as Drew walked off heading home. He didn't even have the decency to tell her the truth.

* * *

"Blue eyes, do you know what you do to me." They were parked making out in the back seat of Morty. Clare's mind was so foggy she couldn't concentrate. Her lips were so swollen and red right now. Eli wanted to tell her so bad to forget about the dance.

"Maybe we should go in?" Clare was asking. Eli silenced her with another kiss. This time he got caught up in his emotions and started to unzip her dress. Clare didn't stop him. He was driven by love and lust as she was.

"Clare I love you so much." Eli whispered in her ear then traveled to her neck kissing it.

"Eli" she whispered. "I can't. Not yet."

"On your time." Eli collected himself and zipped up her dress. Clare brushed her hair and they walked to the dance.

* * *

Alli was so happy she dismissed Drew she didn't know what to do. She felt guilty though because of Sav. Anya looked miserable watching Sav move on with his life and she could not. Alli knew they loved eachother, but neither of them could do anything about it. Both would not budge. Honestly, she believed Anya could do better. Love isn't the only thing in a relationship entails. Sav gave her love without question. He couldn't give her what she really needed, courage. Sav could not summon the courage to stand up to his family.

* * *

"Fiona." Adam hugged her.

"Hey." Fiona blushed. She looked so cute. He was dreading the following sentence.

"I can't be here with you Fiona."

"Why?" Her bubbly expression turned into a saddened one.

"Because I'm different."

"Adam so am I. I'm stuck-up, antisocial, a drama queen." She laughed.

"No I…just am. I got to go." Adam tried to escape.

"If you go. I go too...or was that kiss out of pity." Adam couldn't help but smile. She wasn't going to let him go. Fiona clutched to his wrist and followed.

* * *

"Finally, we got time to ourselves." Sav snuck Holly J to the main office.

"I know. I've been thinking about you."

"Me too." Sav pulled her in for a kiss.

"We're on dangerous waters." She said in between kisses.

"I know but, you like it." Sav tickled her.


	7. We're sick like animals

"So are you enjoying your time?" Alli asked Clare. They were applying their make-up in the bathroom. The night was pretty spectacular. Everyone left their worries outside and enjoyed themselves. The music drilled the constant drama out of everyone's minds...for now.

"Yeah. I know you were having a good time too." Clare hinted with a smirk on her face.

"Eli taught you how to smirk I take." Alli giggled.

"And Dave is teaching you how to dance... and smile again." Clare laughed.

"uhhhhhh"

"What the heck was that?"Alli jumped.

"I think it came from that stall?" Clare grabbed Alli's hand as they tip-toed.

"Are you ok?" Clare asked.

"uhhhhhhhhhhh" The person fell on the floor dropping pills.

"Jenna….diet pills. Alli get help!" Alli called 911 and alerted the paramedics. Clare rested Jenna's head on her lap.

"I'll stay here and get Mr. Simpson."She bolted out. Her animosity towards Jenna disappeared. She was racing against the clock. Amazing how times of panic, erase memories of strife and pain.

"Mr. Simpson. Jenna is unconscious in the bathroom. We called the paramedics."

"Ok Alli go tell Sav to make an announcement that the dance is over." Simpon ran to give aid to Jenna.

"What's going on?" Dave tucked her hair behind her ear. Judging by the looks of it, it had to be pretty bad. Alli was gasping for breath.

"Jenna…..unconscious…..girls' bathroom." Alli stated with fluster.

"Ok calm down. Let's call 911." He was in a world of panic, but he had to be able to think straight.

"Already done. I have to find Sav."

"Let's split up then. I'll tell Anya to make the announcement." He grabbed her waist and kissed her quick. She was running on adrenaline; she didn't know how to react. As he was about to find Anya, Alli turned him around and kissed him.

"We'll finish this later." Alli smiled.

"We will."Dave ran off.

* * *

Sav and Holly J walked different ways to the gym. They didn't want to look suspicious. To her shock, the student body was leaving.

"Dave where is everyone going?"" Holly J asked.

"Home. Jenna almost had an overdose."

"Is she ok?" Holly J looked outside at the paramedics loading Jenna.

"I don't know, they're taking her to the hospital."

"Sav I cannot believe you were tongue tieing with Holly J." Dave and Holly J were listening to their conversation as they as walked through the halls.

"Jenna is on her way to the hospital." Alli informed him.

"It's not my fault she O.D."Sav stated. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to sound so harsh."

"No your right but you should have been here anyways." Alli said. Clare and Eli came back inside.

"We talked to the paramedics. We couldn't get in touch with her dad. So do you guys want a ride?" Eli asked.

"Yeah, sure." Dave said.

"See you guys later." Alli said leaving Sav and Holly J to clean up.

"Are you girls ok?" Dave asked.

"How are we supposed to feel?" Alli asked. She was so lost.

"I mean…Jenna used to be your friend…her accident must have some affect." Eli reinforced.

"Of course it does Eli. We don't hate her." Eli kissed the palm her hand; Dave held Alli in his arms.

As they arrived in the emergency room, The doctor stopped them.

"are you here for Jenna Middleton?"

"Yeah." They all stood there, worry engrained on their faces.

"We pumped her stomach. She's stabilized. Right now, she needs rest. You all can check up on her, just don't stay for to long."

"I'm going to the bathroom." Alli said.

"Should I go after her?" Clare asked.

"No…she needs time alone." Dave stated. As she headed to the bathroom, she called Drew.

"Drew Jenna is in the hospital, thanks to you. She overdosed on some diet pills. When you get this message, I hope you decide to see her." She didn't want to make the call in front of Dave because she didn't want him to make something out of nothing. Clare walked in as she hung up the phone.

"You called Drew didn't you?"

"Yeah."

"Its ok. I understand. Don't worry I won't tell Dave. You ready to see her?" Clare grabbed her hand for strength. As they walked through the door, the sight of her scared them. Jenna looked so weak, her face was pale, and she had tubes and IVs in her arms and nose.

"Anyone there?" Jenna whispered opening her eyes.

"Yeah. Us." Alli said.

"Why?" Jenna turned her head ashamed and embarrassed.

"Because we care?"Clare stated.

"No you don't you feel guilty or you wanted to see If I survived."

"You are so ungrateful. We found you there…lying on the ground…We were so scared and worried. We didn't even think about how you wronged us in the past. If anything, you need to say thank you."Alli screamed. Jenna began to cry; the girls walked out.

"How is she?" Eli asked.

"Real peachy." Clare stated. Alli stared at the door as Drew walked in. Dave felt like the air had been punched out of him; she still liked him.

"Alli, how is Jenna? I got your message."

"She's great. No thanks to you Drew. She already had insecurity issues." Clare chastised him.

"I'm sorry ok. I didn't think it would go this far. Can I see her?" Drew asked.

"I don't think that's a good idea." Eli reinforced. "Who knows what else she might try to do?" Alli was just observing Drew. He was acting like his old self again. Still, he had so many sides to him.

"I'm going to go then. Alli can I talk to you for a second?" Alli walked off with him. She didn't catch Dave's depressed eyes.

"Alli. You calling me proves to me that you want us back together. I want you back."

"I'm sorry. I can't give you that. You weren't the only one cheating either…maybe physically, but I cheated emotionally. As time grew, someone I thought I left behind came back. I couldn't stop thinking about him, Dave. I don't want this anymore like I said before. I want someone else."

When she walked through the door Dave was expecting her to say she and Drew were together. She did the exact opposite; she sat by him resting her head on his shoulder. He couldn't be anymore happier.

"Guys it's getting late. We have to get some sleep. Jenna's not going to get better over night." Eli stated.

"You guys can crash at my place. I stay a block around the corner and my parents are gone for the weekend." Dave said. The dance took an unexpected turn for the worse. No one saw this coming.


	8. I won't sleep tonight

"The guest room is down the hall to your right. It has a walk in bathroom." Dave explained. Clare knew she was wrong to think this but she wanted to share the guest bed with Eli. Alli could tell what Clare wanted. That's why she was the shy one and Alli was the assertive one.

"Um Dave? Can I sleep with you?" She asked timidly. Dave nodded.

"Yeah. I…mean…if that is what you want? I could..." Dave stuttered as Alli grabbed his hand.

"Dave it's ok... me and Eli can sleep together as well." Clare blushed. By this rate, she was going to be permenantly red.

"You're so cute when you blush." Eli smirked.

"Good night; see you in the morning." They said.

* * *

"I just realized, I have nothing to wear for bed." Clare said.

"Here." Eli took his shirt off and handed it to Clare. Eli smirked as she looked at his well toned chest. How could he hide those rippling muscles underneath all black? She found herself wanting to run her fingers up and down his body.

"Umm….sorry, I didn't mean to stare." Clare excused herself to the bathroom. When she came out, he couldn't help but stare at her legs. Clare noticed this as she got into the bed. Eli had never been so nervous in his life. Having her so close to him like this was torture. She must have felt it too because she had her back turned to him.

"_Please turn around."_

"Clare…Please turn around." He asked.

"I can't…because…if I do I'll get lost in…your eyes." She said truthfully.

"Maybe… that's what I want." Eli said. He could tell she was still debating, after what seemed like a lifetime, she turned around. He scooted closer to her, putting his arm around her waist. His hands played in her hair and touching her lips.

"They're so soft." He whispered. Clare's heart was beating so fast.

* * *

"Thanks for letting me borrow the shirt and boy shorts." Alli said.

"No problem. Anytime." Dave was so confused. What were he and Alli? Of course he wanted more, but she could never be his. Drew had her heart. It was a landslide failure for him. Alli could read his face as she got into bed. She had always liked Dave. It just took her so long to realize it. Why would he want her anyways after how he treated her? She deserved to be alone.

* * *

Eli couldn't help it. He had to kiss her again. This was not like the kisses in the past. This was a kiss he put all of his emotions into. A kiss of passion, affection, and love. He found himself on top of her as she embraced him with open arms.

"Clare I love you so much." Eli kissed her.

"I love you too." Clare was trying to catch her breath.

* * *

"Alli what is going on between us?" Dave asked.

"Something that can't be explained. I….know you think I like Drew. I don't. I used to but the truth is I always liked you. I just got so caught up in getting the popular guy, but with you I don't have to pretend to be something I'm not. You accept me for who I am. I wasn't angry about being number 42 on your list. I was mad because I thought you didn't see me as your number one. I wanted so bad to have all the friends and popularity in the world until I realized I have that already."

"You do." Dave brought her into his arms. "I was so angry at you for hurting me, but I still thought about you. I still dreamt about you. You have no idea how good it feels to have you here with me."

"You still want me?" Alli cried.

"Do you want me?" Dave asked.

"I really do." Alli said as he wiped her tears.

"Can I…" Alli beat him to punch and captured his lips. She had no idea how soft they were. Dave was thinking the same thing. He never would have guessed in a million years that Alliah Bhandari would want him.

* * *

Clare rested her head on Eli's chest. After a mind blowing kiss like that, sleep was far from her mind. Eli was rubbing her back gently.

"You make me hope again Clare." He kissed her fingers. "I have someone to be there for me. Someone who loves me. After the accident, I never thought someone could care for me. I was just breathing with no purpose."

"You make me believe in love. I always idolized Darcy. She was always the better sister. Everything she touched turned into gold. When…she was raped….it not only hurt her, it hurt me. I lost faith in people. K.C., my dad…I didn't know what to do."

"Now you know where you belong." Eli commented. "You belong with me."

"I like the sound of that." Clare smiled.

* * *

"Adam what are you running from?" Fiona. They were lying side by side by the lake.

"Everyone….everything." He simply said. "Why does life have to be complicated?"

"Because it's life. It's what gives us purpose." Fiona explained.

"Do you know what your purpose is?" He asked

"No." she turned to look at him. Adam could feel her eyes on him.

"You're like a porcelain doll. You are the symbol of classic beauty, and yet you're hollow inside. It's like you're waiting on someone to make you whole again." Adam knew she wanted him to be the one person but he couldn't. Not now. Not ever.

"It's two o' clock. You should be getting home." Adam helped her on her feet. Fiona was not used to having someone there for her who trying cared for her, besides her brother. Was this a dream? Could this man really be different? She leaned in and kissed him lightly on the lips. He wanted to enjoy the kiss, but it was lie.

"Fiona…don't ever do that again." He pushed her away, leaving her crying.

* * *

Alli woke up in the middle of the night on Dave's chest. She laughed at his light snoring. She was listening to his heart. It relaxed her, knowing she was with him. She felt his arm tighten around her waist.

"How long have you been up?" Dave asked.

"About ten minutes."

"Alli….why were you always so cruel to me?" Alli nearly cried when she saw his big brown eyes.

"I was fighting my feelings toward you. I kept pushing you away until you finally left. Then I wanted you back the minute you left. Sometimes….I would close my eyes and wish that nothing changed from last year." Alli said.

"This is the old Alli I miss. The honest one."

"I'm glad you didn't change." Alli voice began to break.. Dave wanted to kiss her again but he was still nervous around her. Alli could tell. She was ready to stop playing games with his heart. She was ready to give her heart to him. She was ready to show him how much she did love him. Dave was captivated by her eyes. Dave leaned in and kissed her. Alli wanted to deepen it but she let Dave take control. She moaned when his tongue entered her mouth. Her taste was amazing. It was like cinnamon and vanilla in an unusual concoction.

"Come on." Dave grabbed her hand. "Let's get something to eat."

* * *

Even though it was 9 o'clock, Clare couldn't wake Eli up. He slept so peacefully. She smiled at his softened features. His usual smirk had disappeared. He was truly beautiful to her. She kissed him.

"Enjoying the view." Eli gathered her in his arms.

"What if I was?" Clare blushed.

"Then I am a very lucky man." Eli smiled.

"Did you dream about you?"

"I would like to show you rather than tell you one day." Eli began tickling her.

* * *

"You have a visitor Jenna." The nurse said. K.C. enterend the room.

"Why are you here? Do you want to see…."

"Jenna stop. I was really worried about you. How could you try to."

"Kill myself? I have no friends, no boyfriend, no family. I am all alone."

"Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You had me, Clare, Alli, Dave and Connor. We were like the Scooby Gang. You messed it up yourself."

"What do you want from me? An apology? Ok I am insensible…."

"Keep the apology. You don't really mean it." K.C. walked out.

* * *

Clare kissed Eli as he dropped her off. As she walked up the driveway, she began to think up an excuse. Eli was becoming a bad infuence on her. She was lieing to her parents. Before Clare to open the door, she was taken by surprise.

"Darcy. You're home" She screamed and hugged her sister.

"Yeah I am back for sure and this time I am here to stay."


	9. It's getting heavier

"So let me guess. That hottie that just drove off must have been where you were at last night." Darcy said handing Clare a teacup.

"Yeah…long story short….ex friend had an overdose at the dance. It got late, we stayed the night over a friend's house." Clare explained. She was so happy her big sister was back. Now she had someone who understood her life. She did have Eli and Alli, but this was different. Darcy was finally at peace. It was good to be home.

"I hope she gets better." Darcy poured herself a cup and sat down. "Your letters were always a thrill to read."

"You actually read them" Clare's eyes brightened.

"Of course. Why wouldn't I. That's why I came back in hopes to help mom and dad."

"They are doing better." Darcy shrugged at her comment.

"Clare….no they….are not. Things have been bad for a while. You were just so young, you didn't realize it. They never argued in front of you. I'm sorry its just that I can't keep the truth away from you." Clare gulped. Deep down she knew Darcy was telling the truth. She wanted to believe so badly that her parents had a chance.

"I'm sorry Clare but that was one of the reasons I was so hesitant to tell them about my rape."

"How can you speak of it as if it is so casual." A tear fell from Clare's eyes. Darcy joined Clare on the couch and rested her head on her shoulder.

"Because…it did happen. It is a part of my life. I take it one day at a time. Clare you are so strong for everyone. It is time I am strong for you." Darcy held her little sister's shaking body.

* * *

"Hey Fifi. What's up?" Declan skyped.

"Hey big brother. My life has officially gotten even more complicated."

"How? Please tell my you did not make another scene." Declan rolled his eyes.

"Are you my brother or judge?" Fiona snapped.

"Sorry. What happened."

"I met this guy…Adam…but he is hiding something from me. It's obvious he likes me but something is holding him back."

"Right now I am not the person you should be asking love advice from." Declan stated.

"Can you blame her? You cheated on her with Tinsley of all people." Fiona drank her champagne.

"I tried to make it right." Declan stated.

"With money. I've learned money can't get people's affection." Fiona said.

"Do you want to know what I think?" Declan sighed. She nodded.

"Tell him how you feel."

"Thanks Dax. I love you. Talk to you." She signed off. Fiona was going to take the direct approach. She was not going to give up on him.

* * *

"I'm sorry for breaking down." Clare sniffled.

"Why because you are human. Clare it's ok to vulnerable." Darcy explained.

"I have to strong Darcy. If I let go…who else will try…."

"That's the point Clare. You are fourteen. You need to be worried about Eli and yearbook and grades. If mom and dad want to let go, they should. They need to be happy. Why do you think they are not here….because they both live in dysfunction. They had to get away."

"You're right but that's why I was so scared to get close to Eli…because of mom and dad…you and Peter.

"Stop while you are ahead. You can't compare us to you. I know it's human nature to do so, but you can't. If you hadn't have blocked out the past, where would you be now…miserable with no mystery man in black to love." Darcy teased.

"You are so absolutely right." Clare took a sip.

"How is Peter?" Darcy asked. Clare smiled. She knew he one of the reasons she came back.

"He's good. You should go see him at "The Dot."

"No I can't. I really hurt him by leaving."

"But you had to do what was best for you." Clare said.

"Yeah but he has moved on."

"So what his last real girlfriend was Mia." Darcy choked.

"Momma Mia."

"Darcy, please be nice. Anyways she went to Paris for modeling. I know he misses you."

"Maybe I should go see him."

* * *

"I see you finally came to your senses. I give accurate instructions don't I." Drew said leaning against the doorframe.

"As if. I'm here to see your brother." Fiona let herself in. "Adam." She yelled.

"What are you doing here?" he came down the stairs.

"I needed to talk to you alone." Adam led her up to his room. "How did you know where I lived."

"Once upon a time, Drew asked me to help him with his marketing homework. He insisted I come to house. I declined."

"Who was that?" Mrs. Torres asked Drew.

"That's Fiona." Drew raised his eyebrows.

"Does she know?"

"Idk." Drew said.

"I thought I told you…." Fiona didn't listen to him. She grabbed him by the collar and kissed him. Adam tried to push her off, but it was useless. She wouldn't let go. He didn't want to either, he almost forgot how it felt to kiss her. He gave in.

"You were saying." Fiona collected herself.

"I…can't give you what you want." Adam refused to look at her.

"Correction. You can't give me what we both want. Why are you constantly pushing me away? I thought we had something." Fiona stated.

"We do…we do." Adam caved in.

"Then tell me." She cupped his face, wiping the tears fron his eyes. She was scared. How much was he harboring?

"Adam." Mrs. Torres knocked on the door.

"Ma'am." Fiona released his face.

"I need to talk to you for a minute."

"Wait here Fiona. Please." He kissed her gently.

"Ok." She let go of his wrist.

"Does she know Adam?" His mom whispered. "She needs to know what she is getting herself into."

"Mom I know. I was just about to tell her."

"I'm sorry…son. Be careful. I am so proud of you." She kissed his cheek. As he sat down on his bed, he grabbed her hand. Fiona stared at him intently waiting.

" I am trapped…in….the wrong body." Fiona's loosened her grip.

"What?"

"If you are mad at me. At least let me finish." Fiona remained silent. "I am transgender. Please don't hate me." He cried. Fiona lifted her face.

"So you are a man inside of a female." She repeated his statement. She had to in order to understand it herself. She was so confused. She had fallen for him or her? What was she going to do? Follow her heart or her reputation?

"Do you hate me?"

"No. I am just surprised. You were not lying, life is complicated."

"You don't have to say anything." Adam stood up and opened his door. "You are a good person Fiona. Any man is lucky to be with you. Just go." Fiona was shaking her head as she left the house.

* * *

"I need a milkshake Peter." Eli said.

"Sure…one coming up." Peter said. "How is Jenna doing?"

"She is good."

"So how is Clare doing?" Peter asked with concern.

"Good I dropped her off."

"I'm just checking. She was like my ex sister-in-law." Peter smiled.

* * *

"I am about to make a fool out of myself." Darcy was staring at Peter through the glass door. He didn't see her. Good.

* * *

"Yeah sorry about that. Clare told me about you and Darcy."

"So…um…have you met her parents yet." Peter said pouring his milkshake trying to change the subject.

"I have not….when I dropped her off I saw a girl let her in." Eli simply said. Peter's heart jumped.

"Did she have long copper hair and a piercing smile." Peter asked.

"I didn't look that hard at her." He laughed. "But yeah."

* * *

Darcy was still outside talking to herself. People were staring at her as they walked by. They thought she was crazy. She thought she was crazy. Making up her mind, she walked in.

Peter dropped the glass. Seeing Darcy walk through the door stopped his heart. He couldn't breathe. As he picked up the glass, a large shard cut his hand.

"O, crap." Peter said in pain.

"Here let me help with that." Darcy grabbed a dish towel pressing it to his wound. Peter was smiling as she nursed him. He missed her touch. He loved Mia, but Darcy was his happy ending.

"Peter, are you…" Peter leaned in grazing his lips against her. Darcy stopped. It was barely a kiss but it had a big impact on her. Being with Peter made everything so clear. She leaned back in, slowly, cautiously. As their lips touched, he lightly sucked on her bottom lip. As her mouth opened, he slipped his tongue in. Enjoying the sensation, she began to run her fingers through his hair. When both realized what they were doing, they pulled apart blushing.

"I love you Darcy." Peter said.

"I love you too." Darcy said.


	10. Hush, hush the world is quiet

"So, you did enjoy going to the comic book convention with me?" Dave laughed as Alli sat in his getting ready for class to start.

"Actually I did. It was something new. I didn't know people were costumes." Alli stated.

"Yeah…"He looked off remebering the pandemonium.

"You are so dorktastic." She teased.

"And you love it." Dave kissed her; she giggled.

"I do….love you." She said shyly.

"I know. I love you too." He kissed her nose.

"Anyways...since we did something you liked, it's your turn to do something I like." Alli suggested.

"What do you have in mind?" Dave asked; Alli began rubbing her chin.

"Belly dancing." She smiled.

"On one condition."

"Name it."

"You have to give me a private show." He whispered in her ear beginning to nibble it.

"Dave…Alli….that is inappropriate conduct. Separate now." Ms. Oh chastised. The two teens giggled.

* * *

"Are you ok." Eli asked holding Clare.

"Yeah I will be. The divorce is for the best. I saw it coming. It's just hard knowing that your parents will no longer be together." Clare laced her fingers with his.

"You are more fortunate than I am. I wish I could remember my parents being together."

"When they told me and Darcy…they were so…blunt. It was if they had no more fight left in them. Can you imagine being in a relationship with no love? I don't ever want to go through that." Eli kissed her on the forehead.

"How is Darcy holding up?"

"She's as well as to be expected. I was trying to protect her because of all she has been through. I want her to be happy."

"And you don't think you deserve happiness as well. Clare you are the most loving person I know. The sacrifices you make for your friends and family is of great magnitude. How come you can't see what I see?"

"I don't know."

"Listen because I am only going to say this once. If anything, it is your turn to be stress-free. It is your turn to breathe. You are so strong. It's why I admire you so much." Clare gently kissed him.

* * *

"Riley. Please don't start again." Anya closed her locker.

"You at least need closure." He said.

"There is no need." Anya watched as Sav and Holly J were hanging up flyers.

"Maybe you are right. He is just moving on with his life. I want to move on with mine." Anya wiped a tear away. She wanted Sav to be happy even if it were not with her. That is the definition of love.

* * *

"Sorry about that kiss the other day Peter." Darcy ate her hot dog.

"Why?" Peter stopped wiping the counter.

"It was in poor taste. I barely said "hi." She laughed.

"That was in poor taste." Peter smiled.

"Are your parents…" He began.

"Still at odds….most definitely….they are getting a divorce." Darcy frowned.

"I'm sorry." He walked around the counter to give her a hug.

"We will be ok. I just want it all to be over especially for Clare. She feels as if she has to show no emotion when it comes to these matters. Hopefully, Eli will help. He's a cool kid." She smiled.

"So I guess taking you out tonight is out of the question." Peter proposed.

"That's in bad taste." She joked wiping her mouth with her napkin. Peter kissed her on the forehead.

"I'll pick you up at 9." He stated.

* * *

"What's the matter?" Holly J asked Fiona.

"Nothing. I just have a lot of things in on my mind right now."

"Does Adam have to do with any of it?"

"I'll tell you about it in time Holly J."

"Ok. I'm here to listen Fifi." Hugging her friend, she entered class. She couldn't concentrate. No matter how hard she couldnot hate Adam. They were so similar yet different. Both were disliked and misunderstood for who they were, neither knew how to handle life, so they take the safe way and ran. She was tired of running. She was tired of fighting. She was hoping Adam would forgive her for leaving him like that. Even though he had a girl's body, she identified him as a man. What should she do? She should leave. That was the answer. She couldn't concentrate anymore on Perino's lecture. A fake excuse to leave was her only option. Perino believed her lie because she was not herself today. She had bags underneath her eyes and her skin was paler than usual. As she drove home, she spotted none other than Adam walking. She slowly stopped.

"….hey." Adam said.

"Hey….um…you shouldn't be walking by yourself." Fiona chastised. Adam took it as a cue to get in the car.

"You know…its in the day." Adam said.

"…" Fiona continued to drive. She was confusing herself. She was trying to convince herself to leave him alone, yet she picked him up.

"If you are going to ignore me any longer, please, just drop me off."

"Adam, I don't know what to say. I don't even know what to feel. I can never trust my feelings….Riley, Bobby, you."

"Before we get into serious conversation here, we need to go somewhere. You don't need to be distracted while you drive." As Fiona pulled up into her condo, Adam was nervous. He didn't know what to expect. Only his mind was male. She only sees him as female. When she opened the door, Adam was not surprised. Her place reflected herself, distinguished, refined, elegant. Adam took control by grabbing her hand, and leading her to the sofa.

"Adam, my emotions are my downfall. Every man who I come in contact with, hurts me. I'm scared Adam."

"…So you do see me as a man." He smiled to himself.

"Yes. I do. Am I wrong. You are so not like anyone I've met before. Your generous, kind, clever…"

"Fiona, I'm not saying this will be easy, but we will take it one step at a time." Adam kissed her cheek.

"Ok. That is all I expect." She smiled.

* * *

"Go away Connor. I don't want to talk to anyone." Jenna barked.

"Wallowing in self-pity I see." Connor observed. He elected himself the handyman because he always restores the broken. That was his purpose.

"I don't know why you are trying. Everyone has." She folded her arms.

"Jenna. We all make mistakes. We are human. I am not here to judge you. I don't think you are bad person." Connor sat beside in a chair.

"Yes you do. You are a bad liar. I can see it in your eyes." She cried.

"What you did was bad but it does not make you bad. You just let jealousy and lust consume you." He evaluated.

"Are you always so truthful?" Jenna said sarcastically.

"Sarcasm, I detect. Jenna you can't run away from your problems. You are lucky. I can't run away from my Asperser's but I learn to cope and deal. It gets better every day. You will get better too. When will you be back?"

"In a couple of days. I've worn out my welcome." She was glad Connor came. He had the strange gift of saying what needs to be said. It was time to get her life together.


	11. Take a bite of my heart tonight

"That was amazing." Darcy said. She and Peter were bathing in afterglow. Not only did they miss one another; their bodies missed one another as well. It was like everything was in sync once more. All was right in the world.

"Do you think we rushed?" Darcy asked scared of his none response. He only smiled and pulled her closer.

"No. I don't regret it one bit." Peter kissed her. How long has it been since they were last together? It seemed like an eternity…it was an eternity. Now that he had her, he would never let her go. Darcy's mind was spinning. She definitely did not plan this. The perfect ending to the perfect date. Peter took her joyriding. He marveled the way her hair blew in the wind. How could he forget how beautiful her smile was? As they stopped, they began to have a picnic while they star gazed. Darcy could never forget how well he could cook. As they began to kiss, old memories returned. Memories they both held on too. Memories they wanted to relive and relive again.

"I missed you so much." She exclaimed. "Being with you like this makes me feel so…." Peter kissed her. The way the moon showered over her body made her irresistible to him. He had to have her once more.

"I love you so much." He began to make her his again.

* * *

"Alli, I know it's wrong for me to be happy, but I can't help it. Eli makes me feel so.." Clare started mumbling.

"Invincible, like you can touch the heavens yourself." Alli completed her sentence as she popped in a chick flick.

"Yeah. Should I feel guilty?" Her sky blue eyes began to water.

"Clare.." Ali paused the movie. "You have to remember, this is your parents' struggle. I know that you are worried because of them. It is human nature, you have to live your life."

"Seems like you have been thinking about a lot as well." Clare noticed how her position changed.

"Yeah…I have. Clare I am so scared. I don't know what to do?" Alli began to cry.

* * *

Eli and Adam were having their boys night out, watching classics. The theme of the night was superheroes with the traditionals: batman, superman, and the non-traditionals, teenage mutant ninja turtles.

"You have twisted my arm far enough friend, what is on your mind? Perhaps it is a pristine brunette." Eli inquired.

"Yeah it is." Adam signed. "She doesn't deserve this life to be pushed on her, the ridicule, the fear, the punishment. She needs to be with someone worthy."

"Adam, she can handle it. The girl is not stupid. She did not just jump into something blindsided. She knows the consequences. But the positives outweigh the negative. She is happy. Despite the snickers, she ignores them because of you. She wants you. If you back out now, she will be brokenhearted as well as you.

* * *

"Als, sweetie. What's wrong?" Clare held her friend as she rubbed her back trying to give her comfort.

"Nothing is wrong, but yet it is." Alli wiped her face.

"Can I have a more structured sentence please?" Alli laughed at Clare's comment.

"I love Dave so much. I am so scared that he will turn into Johnny and Drew. We all know I have bad luck with men." She sniffed.

"Alli…you and Dave are solid. Don't let your fear keep you away from something that is meant for you. It took you so long to realize what a great guy you had. There has to be something else." Clare insisted.

"There is….I want to… make love to him." Alli bit her lip. "I promised myself that I would not do…. it with anyone who was not deserving of it. When I realized I wanted to take the next step with Dave, I panicked because I have never had feelings this strong before."

"I feel as if we have switched roles here but Alli, as you told me, its natural to want this especially from someone who loves you. I want the same thing from Eli but I don't want to push it. I feel as if we have all the time in the world. You and Dave do too.

* * *

"What are you doing here?" Anya answered the door surprised to Sav.

"I came to talk about us. I am so confused." Sav sauntered.

"You can't be that confused…being with Holly J." Anya rolled her eyes. She will always love Sav but this was getting old. She was getting tired of this. He would never change his was ways. How does it feel when one loves you and uses you at the same time? Horrible. It was extremely painful when the guy was your first.

"Anya, Holly J and I are just casual. She can never take your place." Sav face softened.

"Unfortunately, I can't take your parents' place either. I understand they are family, but I can't keep trying when you are not taking the plunge for me. Not only that, at school, you act as if I don't even exist."

"You are so right Anya. I don't deserve you. I never did, but I want us to decide right now. What are we going to do?"

"We move on with our lives and find the happiness we both deserve." Anya turned around tears flowing as she walked back into the house.

"Anya I never lied to you. I love you. I always will." Sav walked back into his car. He didn't drive off. He was thinking and mentally punching himself. How could he let her get away? How could she not stop him? That was it. Anya and Sav were no more.

* * *

"So how does it feel to be a ghost?" Clare welcomed Jenna back.

"Awkward as hell." Jenna put her books in her bag. "Everything looks the same. Nothing has changed. The tension remains the same" as she saw Alli walk towards them.

"Don't worry she's not that cruel." Clare reassured her.

"I come in peace…scout's honor." Alli stated. "Are you ready to get the first day over with?"

"Yeah I am…I am so embarrassed. People are already whispering behind my back. I didn't think it was going to be this hard."

"Well, good thing for you, you have people who care for you." Clare grabbed Jenna's right hand. As Drew walked passed her, purposely, Alli grabbed her left hand.

"That's what friend's do." Alli squeezed it. Clare and she were going to give Jenna the strength she needed as they walked down the hall.

* * *

"So I see the geek squad is back in action again." Drew unplugged the computer. Wesley and Connor were cringing but Dave refused to show fear. After all, he was Drew's target. He knew this was coming. Drew was mentally laughing to himself. He wanted to get under Dave's skin. How could Alli choose "loser of the year" over him?

"Kick rocks Drew." Drew regained his composure. When did Dave gain this confidence?

"It's funny you mention that because we all know Alli's going to tell you the same thing eventually. It's inevitable, who would you pick: the dork or Mr. Popularity?

"You know what Drew, you can be smug all you want, but I think Alli has shown you time and time again where she wants to be. If you really care about her, you would want her happy."

"Yeah." Connor backed his best friend up the best of his ability.

"Whatever, you guys are elementary, I am college. I am so over this." Drew huffed.

* * *

"So how are you and your girlfriend doing?" Holly J mocked.

"Real mature H.J."

"The truth is the truth, sugar-coated or not. He has the body of a girl. How are you two…"

"That's none of your business. Just because you are miserable and reduce yourself to having a casual relationship with someone who loves someone else does not give you the right to judge me. Love is love. I love HIM. It may seem wrong to you, but it is everything right to me." Fiona slammed her locker and walked away. Anya could not help but snicker as she saw their argument. Good thing Fiona was a drama queen. As evil as it sounded, she relished the hurt on Holly J's face. To make matters worse, she strolled by her to give her insight.

"If a girl keeps losing friends, maybe it's her rather than her friends. Sounds like she should change her attitude." Anya smirked.


	12. So take it easy on me

"Um..hi Eli…Clare." Fiona joined them at the picnic table for lunch.

"Hey Fiona. How are you? Clare said cordially. Her presence was a little unexpected.

"I know I never really come around you guys but I wanted to do something special for Adam. He has already given me so much. I just want to return the favor." Fiona blushed. Clare and Eli looked at each other mentally agreeing.

"Why don't we double date." Eli proposed.

"He can have the best of both worlds: his friends and the girl he…." Eli bumped her foot gently so Clare wouldn't announce Adam's undying love, "likes." Clare finished.

"That would be great. Thanks. I'm going to go tell him now." She smiled. Seeing her skip away was the funniest thing to Clare. Fiona always looked content. She was never happy nor sad. Now she was obviously happy.

* * *

"Adam, why not?" Fiona asked sitting next to him in front of the lockers.

"Because…" Adam refused to look at her knowing that if he did he would say yes.

"Why not, we could all hang out together. Become friends. I thought that was what you wanted." She pouted.

"It is..its just that….I'm nervous ok. I couldn't stand the thought of anything happening to you. We are protected at school but in the outside world…." She put her finger on his lips. A couple of girls gagged as they walked by.

"Adam I would never let that happen to you. Forget about the ignorant people of this world and concentrate on having a good time with me and your friends." Adam shook his head as kissed her hand. He loved her fire and drive.

"You don't get it…if anything was to happen with you, I would never forgive myself. You have given me so much and yet all have don't is made you sacrifice everything."

"Silly, you have given me happiness, joy, peace of mind…"

"No Fi, you're still oblivious to the situation, you forgave me for lying to you. It was not just a little white lie. It was something humongous that could never be overlooked. You should have yelled at me, slapped me, hated me. Why didn't you?"

"I don't know, but did you really think I would be that callous towards you. I know I have curly hair, but do I look like Bianca to you?"

"Was that your attempt at a joke?" Adam laughed. His humor was rubbing off on her.

"The point is that something told me not to run away…stay close..to you." Fiona turned his head kissing gently.

* * *

"Let me help you with your books, Jenna." K.C. volunteered. Jenna ignored him.

"I'm trying to help, please let me." He insisted.

"You mean like you did with Daniel." Jenna exclaimed. "When I told you I was pregnant, you didn't want me. When I lost him, then you came back. People aren't like light switches. You can't turn them on and off when you want."

"Jenna…..all I can say is that I am sorry. I know I pushed you towards Drew."

"No, you don't know. You never take responsibility for your actions. You always have an excuse. Keep this up and you are just going to end up like your father." She walked away briskly. She was glad she had released her anger, her rage. K.C. deserved to hear at least that.

* * *

"I see your getting ready for tonight." Darcy walked into Clare's room.

"Yeah. I am so nervous. We've been together for 3 months now, and I still have butterflies every time I see him."

"Why don't you sit down? I'll take over from here." As Darcy rambled through her closet, Clare's mind wandered off. She wanted this to be the night. This would be the night where she would leave all of her inhibitions behind. She would love Eli in every way possible.

"Baby Edwards…I found the perfect dress. It was an olive green sundress."

"It's perfect." Clare grinned.

"Ok…spill sis. What's up?"

"Darce, when you are with Peter, how does it feel? I mean is it as beautiful as people describe?"

"Yeah it is but sex is more than just physical, it is mental as well. You have to be mature both ways. You shouldn't rush it. Have you and Eli talked about it?"

"No, he has no idea. I was just thinking that it feels right."

"That's great Clare, but I want you to keep in mind that this is a very important decision. You can't take it back. I mean what about protection?"

"I got some condoms from your closet. Great hiding place." Clare snickered.

"O my gosh. You are so sneaky." Darcy laughed. "I just want you to take your time and do what is right for you."

* * *

Jenna closed her eyes as the gentle breeze blew through her hair. She was so happy she didn't die. Even though life didn't go the way she wanted, there was a silver lining. She was not alone as she thought she was. The smoke clouded her judgment as she coughed.

"Sorry about that." Fitz apologized putting the cigarette away.

"No problem" She stated with annoyance. "So what brings you here?"

"So a guy like me can't enjoy the scenery." Fitz eyed her. He always found her attractive. He just never approached her because a beautiful girl like her would never go for someone like him. The star cheerleader with Degrassi's bad boy, what a joke.

"Why are you talking to me? Shouldn't you be harming someone?" Jenna raised an eyebrow.

"Shouldn't you be trying to commit suicide?" Fitz retorted.

"How dare you?" Jenna stood up attempting to walk away if Fitz hadn't have grabbed her wrist.

"I'm sorry. That was low. Please sit down." Surprising herself, she did as he said. Why did she? Perhaps it was because he was there at the moment.

* * *

O my God, this jalepeno burger is delicious." Fiona took another bite as Adam watched her lovingly. The date was going perfectly. It was matinee madness at the theaters. The movie of choice was "Pyscho." Both men enjoyed as their ladies clutched to them during the shower scene. It was Eli's idea to take them to a local burger joint.

"It certainly is different than eel." Clare laughed as she wiped her mouth.

"I am really enjoying myself. We should do this more in the future." Fiona commented. At first she felt awkward because she thought she was going to be the fourth wheel, but she was not. She blended in perfectly with them. They were so mature. Then she realized, Adam was mature as well.

* * *

"So why did you try to kill yourself." Fitz asked.

"Wow you don't beat around the bush. I did it…..to run way…..to be free…..from Drew, K.C…the baby." Fitz just sat there and listened to her. This was not like him, to actually care about some girl, to respect a girl as much as he did her. She wiped her tears way.

"I use to run too, from my mom. She always found me though." As the sun began to set, Jenna noticed his features. He wasn't bad looking at all. He was tall, slender, and handsome.

"Why are you being nice to me?" Jenna asked.

"Maybe I need a break from what everyone expects me to be." He stated. "Maybe I am nice to those who deserve it."

"I had a really good time." Clare chimed.

"How could you not have a good time with Eli." He said with wit. "Fiona's not that bad once she looses up. Kinda puts me in the mind of someone else." He eyed her.

* * *

"Shut up." She jokingly punches him in the arm. He skillfully grabs her waist kissing her with all the emotion he had for her. He couldn't keep his hands off of her. She was everything to him. He wanted to her in everyway possible. As he laid her down on his bed, he looked in her eyes for any sign that she wasn't ready.

"Eli, baby." She said between kisses.

"Yeah." He whispered as he sucked on her earlobe.

"I'm not ready yet." Clare stated as he kissed her neck.

"Clare I know, but I want give you some pleasure. Do you trust me?" Eli looked into her eyes.

"Yes, Eli I do."

* * *

"Maybe I should go home. It's getting dark." Jenna stood up. For some reason, her leaving him brought fear into Fitz's soul. He dare not show it though. Maybe in another life, but not in this one.

"I will walk you home….i guess." Fitz stated. Jenna smirked. She liked being around him. He was easy to talk to.

"I'm sorry about the baby." Fitz handed her his jacket.

"Thank you." She smiled.


	13. I'm afraid you're never satisfied

"Eli" she held her breath as he licked her neck. His tongue was so hot and she couldn't get enough of it. Eli was so happy that she was allowing him to show her how much he loved her. Her skin was like silk. Never had she been more beautiful than this moment. The way his name escaped her lips made him smile even more. Only he could make her feel like this. Clare didn't know what to do. What she was feeling couldn't be described. She felt his hands unbutton her shirt.

"Clare open your eyes." He whispered in her ear as he sucked on it gently, tantalizing. She did what he said but, she was nervous. She didn't know what to do. To make matters worse, she didn't know what he would do next.

"Am I making you feel uncomfortable? I can stop." He said on top of her, looking in her eyes. God knows he didn't want to.

"No I don't…I just don't know what to do." She turned her head to the side in shame. He turned it back forcing her to look in his eyes.

"You do nothing. This is my gift to you." He laced his fingers with hers as he raised them above her head. As she relaxed, she felt his hands touch places she didn't know existed. Coming down from high, she was at a lost for words. Eli brushed the hair from her sweaty forehead and kissed it.

"Did I make you feel good?" He smirked.

"Without a doubt." She panted. Kissing her softly, he helped put her clothes back on.

"I love you." They said smiling.

* * *

"So how was the night? Anything happen?" Alli asked. She was dying to find out.

"You know me. I don't kiss and tell." Clare smirked. She would not give her best friend the satisfaction. Besides, she didn't believe in kissing and telling. What she shared with Eli was mind-blowing. K.C never in a million years made her feel that good. She could still feel his hands on her. It didn't make her feel dirty though. It made her feel wanted.

Drew wasn't as hostile as everyone thought him to be. He did have a heart. He was sorry for putting Jenna through so much. He just got caught up in being "the man of every girl's dream." It was as bad as it was equally fun. He actually admired her for coming back to Degrassi. She had balls he decided. He needed to apologize to her. Jenna noticed Drew making his way towards her. She was scared out of her mind. Her actions were like a double-edged sword. If she stayed, she would be a fool; if she left, she would be a coward.

"Middleton." Drew casually spoke. Fitz pretended not to care, but he did. Clutching his fists, he became mad at himself for caring about some petty girl. Out of nowhere, he started walking to her. His legs had a mind of their own.

"Jenna…I'm sorry." Drew touched her arm. She winced. She was still uncomfortable around him.

"Pretty boy. I don't think she likes that." Fitz leaned against the locker. Surprising him, she walked behind him. He smiled; he was her protector.

"I was just apologizing. I know I have been an asshole to you. I know I shouldn't be forgiven, but I am sorry." Drew said defeat in his eyes. Jenna nodded. He walked away.

"Thank you." She looked up at his deep chocolate eyes. Had they always been that deep?

"No problem."

"Shouldn't you be…causing someone…I don't know…um…physical pain now." She smiled.

"They get a pass for you." He flirted back.

* * *

"Clare, I think I am going to have to readjust the size of the waist." Fiona said with pins in mouth. Since she and Fiona were getting closer, she volunteered to be her model for the fashion club. Alli decided to be the critic.

"I take it we both had a great time after the date." Fiona smiled.

"Yeah. Wonderful." She agreed. Alli continued to flip through the magazine. She didn't know what happened between both couples, but she wanted it with Dave. Not out of lust, but out of love. He made her feel sexy in so many different ways, but she wanted him to make her feel attractive to him. She knew it was crazy because obviously he was attracted to her, she just wanted more.

"Fiona, I know you barely know me, but I have to ask…."Clare couldn't finish the sentence. Alli did.

"How do you guys…." Alli coaxed.

"We haven't figured that out yet." Fiona looked away. "I want to but he feels as if he can't give me what I need. I mean anatomically speaking, he can't but they have "other things" for that too. I know it's nothing like the real thing but…."

"Sorry to barge in on the conversation" Jenna dropped her bag as she entered the room"but there is more than one way to make love. It's about what's in your heart. Feelings should only matter." Jenna took a sip of her latte.'

"Thanks. Yeah. That's how it should be." Fiona smiled. "So how have you been?"

"I've been good. Nurse Alli and Nurse Clare to the rescue….Drew apologized."

"That's good." Clare smiled.

"I know. Sounds like he has changed his approach to things. Just the other day, he got in Dave's face…"

"What?" Alli dropped the magazine. "How come Dave…?"

"He probably didn't want you to worry." Fiona said.

* * *

"Sup Eli….Adam" Dave gave them a head nod.

"Nuthin much." Adam said.

"I need some advice." He sat down against the locker.

"On what per say?" Eli asked.

"…..Intimacy. I can't exactly ask Connor and Wesley." Dave said.

"I know what you mean." Adam agreed.

"What's the problem?" Eli was very curious. He remembered how nervous he was with Clare. They didn't go all the way but being so close to her on that level was unnerving and exhilarating all in one.

"I think Alli thinks I don't find her….desirable."

"Shut the front door." Eli commented back.

"I do. It's just that every time things seem to…heat up….I push her away."

"And why wouldn't she think you didn't find her attractive again?" Adam asked with sarcasm.

"I push her away because I get scared. She's my first girlfriend and I don't know…"

"Dave you are over thinking it. Let your instincts take over….relax. I'm pretty sure Alli will tell you what she likes and doesn't." Dave embedded the advice in his head.

* * *

"Eli I didn't know a person could make me feel like you do. I didn't know anyone could touch me like you did." Clare sat in his lap.

"Clare, you don't know how much you mean to me." He gently kissed her neck. "I was kinda scared that you would avoid me."

"Why?"

"Because I was the first person to see you so vulnerable." Green eyes met blue.

"This might sound vein, but what do you think of my body." She blushed.

"It's beautiful. Everything about you is beautiful."

"Can…I see….yours' next time." She played with her fingers.

"Clare you can see mine anytime you'd like."

* * *

"Dave if you want to break-up, then get it over with." Alli stated. Dave was shocked that Alli thought that. He was hurt because he knew he was the reason she was standing at his front door with tears in her eyes.

"I was on my way to tell you….."

"I saw it coming. I thought you were….." He didn't let her finish. He captured her lips giving what they both wanted. Alli was in bliss. Dave was finally giving into his feeling, letting himself get lost. His arms wrapped around her waist; her arms found their way around his neck. Without knowing he pulled her inside against the wall. Their tongues met, dancing together. Why was he afraid of this again?

"Als I love you. I've never done this before…." He said.

"I know but we've been together for some time now. Communication is the key. You always take of me and never let me care for you. I want to be here for you too. I am here for you."

"I know." He kissed her guiding her to his bedroom.

**Sorry I haven't been updating regularly. I have been so busy with the college life. LOL :) Thank you all so much for reviewing.**


	14. I won't get out alive

"You know what? I think I have a stalker." Jenna said as she intentionally bumped into Fitz. She had to admit she liked the attention. She actually liked more than that. She liked him, his gruff exterior, his edge, his smile. She was shocked to find him in the music store with a Taylor Swift CD in his hand.

"For my sister….and yes I'm going to buy it." Fitz stated. He liked Jenna but he didn't know what she thought of him. She was too flirtatious. Why did he care what she thought about him in the first place?

"I didn't mean to imply that. Really." She grabbed his hand looking in his eyes. Fitz wanted to kiss her but he couldn't. She was vulnerable. Going through a break-up, miscarriage, attempted suicide, then being the "sideline girl" to someone she started to care for was too crazy. She was an emotional rollercoaster.

"What?" he asked licking his lips.

"Nothing" she backed away. "Your eyes are…really beautiful." Who was she kidding? He probably thought she was a slut. Having a baby from one boy than cheating with another, her moral compass was not at all time high.

* * *

"You okay mom." Clare asked her mom setting the table.

"We can take over." Darcy took the silverware away from her.

"Girls. I am….as fine as to be expected. This is the best for both of us. I want you guys to know that we love you both so much. It had nothing to do with you. So please, stop blaming yourselves. Everything is going to be alright. Me and your father both respect each other. There is no more animosity…at least anymore." She giggled. Darcy and Clare were happy to see their mom smiling again.

"We love you mom." They both engulfed her in a hug.

"I needed that." Their mom smiled. "So I finally get to meet this Eli. Darce says he's a…hot, emo."

"Yeah. Please be nice mom. He's smart, sarcastic, witty. He's a walking enigma." She blushed.

"I'll go get the door. Mom, be on your best behavior." Darcy stated.

"Hey Darce." Eli hugged her. "Where's Clare?"

"Eli." She nearly jumped in his arms.

"Somebody missed me" Eli teased. "Hi Mrs. Edwards." He put Clare down.

"Hello Eli." Her eyes almost bucked out. Emo was an understatement. This boy was gothic. All black, including the eyeliner. What did her daughter see in this guy? Of course he was handsome, but a little bit too much.

* * *

"I should go and leave you alone." Jenna said.

"So that's what do best….make smart remarks." Fitz challenged her.

"What do you mean?" She followed him to the counter as he checked out.

"You push people away. That's how you do it." Fitz figured it out.

"O please. Get over yourself. Let's talk about how you talk with your fists." She folded her arms. He laughed. He was enjoying himself. Making her angry was his newest hobby.

"Yeah I know. That's how come I can recognize it."

* * *

"So Eli. Tell me more about yourself." His mom passed the mashed potatoes to him. She decided to give him a chance. She wanted her children to be happy. Eli seemed to be a stand-up guy. Hopefully the "gothism" was a stage.

"I'm a junior. I was Clare's English partner."

"O, so you love writing too. Who's your favorite author?" Mrs. Edwards asked.

"I like Upton Sinclair. The Jungle is my favorite book."

"Good choice. I'm almost impressed." She took a bite from her plate.

"She's teasing." Clare whispered as she passed the salad.

"I hope." Eli wiped his mouth. Clare's mom was intense. Like mother like daughter. The dinner wasn't as bad as he thought it would be. He was doing this for Clare. She told him how her mom was. He had to admire her strength. Going through a bitter divorce, yet you can still put your daughter first proved how good of a mother she was. When they cleaned the dishes, they dashed to her room.

Eli stared at her as she continued to study. He smiled as her agile fingers turned the page. Being around her made his. Her meekness was a part of his charm. He felt as if they were meant for each other. Her body in its naked glory flashed through his mind. He memorized every inch. He knew she wanted to see him too. He was waiting. Reading his mind, she put the book down on her bed. He was anticipating. As she moved towards him, she kissed him gently. His lips were like soft pillows to her. Eli couldn't hold back his need. He pushed his tongue in her mouth hard. Clare was taken by surprised, but didn't stop. Her hands found their way underneath his shirt. She broke the kiss to lift up his shirt. Smirking he moved her hands to his abs. Taking the hint, she gently moved her hands over his defined chest. Clare felt as if she were in a dream. This seemed so surreal to her, like an out-of-body experience.

* * *

"Fitz I'm so sorry." Jenna traced the cigarette burn marks on his sleeve. That explains why he never shows his arms.

"Don't pity me. I don't want it." He rolled the sleeve down. He refused to look at Jenna's face.

"It's not pity; it sympathy. There's a difference."

"You're lucky, I would have rather not have known about my mother." He said.

"Fitz, there's still a void….inside of me. At least you know where you come from. All I know about her is that she left me with my dad 3 weeks after my birth. My dad drives trucks for a living so he is in and out. My brother just enlisted in the ARMY. I couldn't tell him about the suicide. He has too much on his mind." Jenna explained. Fitz could hear the disdain in her voice.

"It's just me and my sister. I became emancipated last year. My mother is a drug addict."

"How can you say it so calmly?"

"I've learn to deal with it. I have to take care of Kathy. I have to be strong for both of us. Every time she comes back into both of our lives, havoc always follows. Kath cries for days. All I can tell her is that mom is very sick right now."

"Aww the big brother looking out for his little sister. That's sweet. At least you have someone. I am alone. I only communicate with my brother through letters."

"What about Clare and Alli?" Fitz asked flagging down the hot dog man.

"Things are getting better. I don't think they can ever fully trust me. I don't blame them." She said saddened as Fitz gave her the hot dog.

"It takes time." Fitz said.

"Who knew you were a Dr. Phil." Jenna ate her hot dog, not realizing mustard was on her lip. Fitz wiped it off with a napkin. He was staring in her eyes again. Should he kiss her? Would she push him away? He didn't care. At this moment, a spark was ignited. Jenna knew what he about to do, and she wanted it, but she wasn't ready yet. She made the fakest sneeze ever. He didn't get mad, he just pretended as if it never happened.

"I'll walk you home."

"Yeah…I would like that."

* * *

"Eli I don't want to wake my mom." Clare whispered as he unzipped her pants.

"I'm sorry baby. I just have to touch you again. I've been thinking about this all day" he nibbled her ear. He knew that was her weakness. She moaned instantly.

"We still have to stop. I mean what if…." Eli kissed her.

"So you haven't thought about me touching you or you touching me." He whispered sensually. She didn't respond. He took it as a yes, taking off her shirt and unclasping her bra.

* * *

"Dave. Did that just happen?" Alli smiled the brightest smile. She was so happy. He finally showed her. He finally let her show him how much she loved him. It was weird, they didn't have sex, but they both accomplished much more. It was like a mental connection.

"Yeah." He said kissing her shoulder. "How could you think I wanted to break up with you?" He laughed.

"I don't know." She felt stupid for even thinking such a thing. She licked her lips as she eyed his chest.

"I've been working out a little bit for you." He teased rubbing her stomach. He was replaying it all in his head. He had gently removed her clothes. With patience, he kissed every part of her body. At first he thought he was causing her discomfort, but when he stopped, she begged for him to continue. This gave his ego a boost. There was no more fear, only love. Nothing else needed to be said. He gathered her in his arms as they kissed sweetly.


	15. The animal inside of you

The animal inside of you

"Jenna. I drew a picture of us." Kathy showed her with pride. She was simply adorable. Over the past month, Fitz and she became close. They shared secrets they had never shared with anyone. This trust created a bond between the two. She volunteered to babysit Kathy on days when he worked late at the mechanic shop. He was so excited when he got job; more money meant less struggling. Jenna didn't mind the kid at all. She wasn't any trouble.

"Yeah I see. It's beautiful." She smiled. For five, Kathy was talented. On the top of the page she wrote "My family." She drew 3 stick figures. She was in the middle, Fitz was on the right, Jenna she was on the left. They were holding the little girl's hand.

"I drew you in pink, because pretty girls should wear pink." She smiled; Jenna placed the picture on the refrigerator.

"Come on kiddo, time to go to bed." As the two got into the bed, they said their prayers.

"God, please bless Jenna. She is really nice and Fitz really likes her. I hope she likes him too. God bless mom so she can get better. God bless Fitz so he won't be so lonely anymore. Amen."

"That was a nice prayer. I'm sure God heard you." Jenna kissed her forehead.

"Jenna do you get lonely like Fitz does. When you go away, he misses you. Do you miss him?" Her innocence never ceased to amaze her. Were all kids this insightful?

"Yeah, but I have you too. No more stalling. Go to bed."

* * *

She watched as her mother signed the last document. She was no longer married. She was Ms. Joyce McGowen. She slipped the ring off her finger sighing in relief. Joyce could finally breathe.

"Alli, Clare….you guys came too." Kathy hugged them as Jenna helped her put her skates on. Clare thought it would be good to take her to the skating rink. She loved it when she was little. Grabbing Kathy's hand, Jenna guided her to the floor along with Clare and Alli.

"Look at him Jenni. He can backwards skate." She stared at Dave.

"Don't pay attention to that dear. He's just showing out." Alli joked.

"Eli is having some difficulty I see." Giggling as he fell down. She glided to him helping him up.

"I'm getting the hang of it now." He said.

"You were worse." Jenna asked.

"Yeah." Clare said a little too fast.

* * *

"How was the conference mom?" Fiona hugged her.

"It was great. You look….happy….more orthodox." She said playing with her daughter's delicate curls.

"I am. I'm making more friends. I'm becoming more confident…."

"You are glowing. Who is it?" Fiona was dreading the question. She knew she would have to tell her mom, but how would she react. She already knew. She would go ballistic. Fiona just got rid of the stress with Bobby; moving on was not easy. Now to deal with the ridicule from her mom, would send her back to the same miserable place.

"It is a guy mom, but that's all I can tell you now. You have to trust me."

"….Ok. I will. I'm still your mother, remember that." She kissed Fiona's forehead heading to the bedroom to unpack.

* * *

"So is Fitz a good kisser?" Alli asked; Clare nudged her. "What, you want to know to Clare."

"I haven't kissed him, yet." Jenna waved to Kathy as Dave skated with her around the rink.

"Are you serious?" Clare asked.'

"Yes. I want to…I just need to take things slow." Jenna persisted.

"Don't take things too slow." Alli encouraged. "Has he ever tried to?"

"Yeah."

"I just got the best idea….you surprise him at work today…we can take care of Kathy…we've done it bunches of times when you had to work." Alli suggested.

"Ok…since you guys insist so much."

* * *

"Fitz I need you to change the oil in this car and you are free to go."

"Thanks Lamar." He worked diligently keeping his eye on the prize, Jenna. He never thought he would trust another girl after his mom. He never thought anyone could care for him like she did. She was such a good friend to him, listening to his problems, his frustrations and helping him take care of Kathy. How could K.C. and Drew not see what he had? Being around her, made him want to be a better person. Of course, he was good towards his sister but not to anyone else. His motto was hurt others before they hurt you. Jenna noticed he was in deep thought; she didn't want to distract him so she sat down and watched him do his craft.

"Ok Lamar, see you…..Jenna what are you doing here." She jumped up in his arms; he twirled her around.

"I got grease on you…please tell me Kathy is with Clare and Alli."

"Bingo….and I don't mind the grease." She giggled.

* * *

"Hey Fiona, I bought "The Notebook" and "Kill Bill," Fiona answered the door. "Your mom must be back, I can tell by your face." She nodded pulling him inside.

"She's getting unpacked. You have great timing."

"Fifi, if you want me to go…I will…. I understand."

"No I can't run back down. I love you. I'm not ashamed."

"You didn't tell me…we….had…company. Fiona, who is this?" Her mom asked with apprehension. This could not be the "boy" she had in mind. Her daughter was a lesbian, clearly.

"You need to leave now." She screamed at Adam.

"Mom you can't talk to him like that." She screamed.

"I'll go. It's ok." Adam just got his heart shattered. He knew that was his last time seeing her. She would choose her family. Could you blame her? He should have known she was out of his league.

"Fiona…..explain now."

"It's not what you think. He's transgender."

"And that makes it better. I understand you were going through a rough time with Bobby, but you are still vulnerable. "She" came when you needed someone."

"Mom I am stronger than you think. I have been talking to my therapist, being responsible. What more do you want from me. I'm not saying I'm going to marry "HIM" but I do love him. For once, I am doing what I want to do. You don't have to give me permission. You don't have to like it…but I hope you can learn to be content with it." Fiona grabbed her purse to head to Adam's house.

* * *

"You clean up nice." Jenna admired him. They came back to his place so he could take a shower. Jenna looked on the refrigerator at the various pictures drawn by Kathy. She smiled at the thought of the little girl. She was becoming a part of her life. Everything was coming together. Fitz, Alli, Clare, Dave, and Eli were like her new family.

"Thanks." He blushed. The might Fitz does not blush. Not even for beautiful girls such as Jenna Middleton. As they left for the restaurant, he grabbed her hand, lacing their fingers. She looked up at him smiling squeezing it back.

* * *

"Clare, Alli….look at me I'm flying." She giggled as Eli gave her a piggyback ride.

"Eli and Dave are like big kids." The girls giggled.

"So guess I can't call you St. Clare anymore." Alli teased.

"Yes you can. We haven't done it exactly." Clare laughed.

"Not in that way at least. Who am I talk? Me and Dave are planning too." She grinned from ear-to-ear. "I'm ready. He's the one."

"I'm so happy for you Als. I'm going to try to hold out a little bit longer, but at this rate I don't think I'm going to last longer." Clare admitted.

"What's so funny is that Johnny and Drew are so distant now. The pain isn't there anymore. It's like they didn't exist."

* * *

"Did you enjoy the enchiladas?" Jenna asked.

"Yeah. I did." Fitz said admiring her beauty. Jenna noticed this, blushing.

"Thanks…for….taking me." Her heart was beating so fast. He grabbed her hand escorting her outside to his car. As her reached to turn the ignition on, Jenna stopped him.

"Wait….Fitz….I….I…" She couldn't find the words. She didn't need words; she needed to show him that he was different. She cupped his face kissing him gently. Fitz was cheering mentally. He wasn't planning to let go anytime soon.


	16. I do this everytime

"Fiona, what are you…." She kissed him gently grabbing his hand. "I want to prove to you that I don't care what anyone else thinks of us." Adam shook his head.

"You don't get it. I can't. I never will." He began to cry.

"Yes you can. Just take my hand." Fiona said.

"You don't get it Fiona. My mind is not good enough. I want to please you in every way possible. I obviously can't."

"Adam, do you know how rare it is to find love? Do you know how rare it is to be with someone who truly understands you and won't judge you? That's how I feel with you. You have to believe it and trust it."

"….ok I trust you." She guided him to his bedroom.

* * *

Jenna didn't know how she got in Fitz's backseat with him on top of her, kissing her like there was no tomorrow, but she was so happy that her dream was her reality. Tongues colliding, both trying to find each other's hot spots, this was too much. Fitz started rubbing his hand up and down her thigh. Jenna ran her hand along his back, trying to take off his shirt.

"No… Jenna stop."

"Why..did I do something wrong?"

"No…you are perfect" he kissed her sweetly.

"My body …shouldn't be seen by your eyes." He said with defeat.

"Why not, I've seen your arms before."

"You deserve to see someone without flaws, without…."

"Stop it. Everyone has flaws." She dried his tears. Fitz is so fragile right now. He needed her, not just physically but emotionally. Fitz wanted to run; he hoped she was lying so he could stay away from her. His love for her was making his life so much more difficult. His meaning of life was changing. He lay there on top of her, holding her waist with his face in the crook of her neck. He looked up in her eyes.

"Do you really want to?"

"Yes, Mark, I do." He returned to plucking her lips. By the way she was moaning, she was enjoying it. Her hands reached for his shirt, taking it off. She kissed the scars on his arms. He closed his eyes enjoying the sensation. He had hooked up with a lot of girls, but this was different. He never made love before. Taking off her shirt, he smiled at her body, kissing her neck. She wanted this badly, but she didn't want the past to repeat itself. He sensed something was wrong.

"I'm sorry."

"No. I just don't want to get hurt again."

"I won't let that happen. I promise." Running his fingers through her hair, he reached down to unbuckle her jeans.

* * *

Luckily for Clare and Eli, Dave and Alli kept Kathy to give them some alone time. Clare pulled off his jacket. All of a sudden, Eli had too many clothes on. Leading him to the bed, she gently pushed him on it. Eli was surprised by her aggression. When did St. Clare turn into a vixen? He didn't have time to answer it; Clare was all he could think about as she licked up and down his neck. She had so much passion pent up. It had to be released. Taking off his shirt, Eli took control by moving on top of her. Biting her bottom lip, he began to touch her chest. Her moans were sweet bells to his ears. Clare couldn't wait anymore; she had to become one with him. She removed his pants.

"Are you sure?" He kissed her stomach, licking her bellybutton.

"I haven't been surer of anything in my life."

"I'll be gentle. Tell me to stop if I hurt you." He kissed her.

* * *

Jenna was trying to wrap her mind around what just happened. She just slept with Fitz; correction, he made love to her. Gentle, slow, hot, right; everything felt right. This right wasn't good enough for her though. How could he do this to someone who was so low? How could he want her, . Fitz was in euphoria. He finally found her. The one who he was looking for, she was laying in his arms.

"Jenna I…"

"This was a mistake." She put her clothes back on.

"What?" Jenna refused to look at him, the hurt in his voice was painful enough, but she was doing him a favor.

"It shouldn't have happened…Please take me home." Fitz didn't say anything. His whole world came crumbling down.

* * *

"Eli." Clare screamed as she came down from her high; Eli kissed her. He was trying to catch his breath. She trusted him so much that she gave her virginity to him. She lay there with her eyes half-opened getting used to the sensation she was feeling. His angel. His beautiful angel.

"Did I hurt you?" He asked.

"No...you're were perfect. This was perfect." She kissed him.

* * *

"So you finally did it." Alli hugged Clare. "Why did you wait so long to tell me?"

"Als, I was waiting for the right moment. The way he touched me, held me, kissed me…. Jenna are you okay?"

"No I'm not you guys. I messed up everything." Jenna cried.

"Slow down." Alli said. "What happened?"

"Fitz made love to me." Jenna blurted.

"Why is that bad?" Clare asked. "I thought…."

"Don't you get it? I'm crazy. No one wants someone who has been knocked-up."

"Fitz does." Alli stated.

"No he only thinks he does. He likes the idea of me rather….."

"In the words of Dave…BULL." Alli said.

* * *

"I never thought I would be talking to you in a million years about this." Fitz sat with Eli.

"Me neither." Eli smirked.

"Out of nowhere she….."

"Runs away." Eli finished.

"I rushed it….I knew it was too good to be true. I thought…"

"Ever think this is not about you but her." Adam joined in.

"Elaborate" Fitz listened.

"She has a lot of faculties she has to deal with. What if she thought you pitied her? Its not a secret all that she has been through."

"Or she could just be scared. What are you going to do?" Eli asked

"I don't know."

* * *

"So how are we going to fix Jenna and Fitz?" Connor asked walking with Dave and Alli.

"Sad to say my man, but there is nothing we can do." Dave explained.

"Jenna can be stubborn at times. When she makes up her mind she never changes it." Alli agreed.

"Maybe she needs a push." Connor said smiling, walking away.

"My parents will be gone this weekend." Dave rested his arm around her shoulders.

"Well….what do you have in mind?" She boldly nibbled on his ear.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" He kissed her.

"I'm becoming a bad influence. Guess you can play "I never" now." She grinned.

* * *

Jenna knew she was wrong but she had to do it. She couldn't be a part of Kathy and Fitz's world. It had been two long agonizing weeks without him. Amazing, she wanted him. Then, when she got him, she ran away. She was her mother's daughter. His voice, his eyes, his smell. She knew seeing him was going to be hard, but seeing him without being able to touch him was harder Fitz was feeling the same way. Every time she passed him in the hallway, he had to fight the impulse to push her into the locker kissing her. He wanted to yell at her for hurting him. How could she do this to him? It was hard enough letting his guard down. Was she that cruel?

"What's your problem Barbie?" Bianca slammed Jenna's locker.

"….."

"O so now you're speechless." Jenna just stood there. Bianca had every right to be in her face after how she did her best friend.

"Look….for some reason…Fitz actually likes you. Don't blow it." She said walking away.


	17. He we are again

"Are you and Jenna not friends anymore?" Kathy asked innocently as Fitz was helping her get ready for school.

"We had a…..mishap."

"What's that? She packed her crayons in her backpack.

"A mistake." He fixed her lunch.

"Well did you apologize?" She put her head band on.

"She's mad at me….why so many questions kiddo?"

"Because….I miss her….you miss her too…please be friends again." She pleaded.

* * *

"Alli you look so cute. Dave won't be able to keep his hands off of you." Fiona gave her the green burlesque outfit.

"That's the plan." Alli hugged her newest friend.

"Mind if I interrupt girl talk." Declan said.

"Dax" Fiona screamed. "What are you doing here?"

"What have you been up too? Being bad?" He raised his eyebrows.

"I'll see you guys later." Alli left.

"No, I've been more than happy. I took your advice and things are going great."

"Yeah about…."

"Hey Fiona." Adam kissed her "I bought you a green tea." "Declan, nice to meet you."

"And you sir." Declan stared him down. His appearance was very peculiar. Adam was becoming uncomfortable.

"I'll see you later babe." He left.

"Okay sweetie."

"Fiona that's not a guy."

"How many times do we have to go over this? I told you…"

"Fi, I know what you told me but you have to get back to reality here. You don't think you two can get married and build a picket fence. Do you?" Declan crossed his arm.

"That's not the point. I'm taking this day by day... yes I do see myself with him."

"Fi, what will people think?"

"Declan, Adam is the best thing that has happened to me in a long time. Why don't you want me happy."

"Maybe because I can see you being happy with someone of the opposite gender." He screamed.

"Now I see why you're here. Mom put you up to it." The twin glared daggers at one another;each not saying a word.

"Guys could you keep it down in here, we have been getting complaints about the….." Holly J cut off in mid sentence, "Declan."

* * *

"Thanks for the CD Clare." Dave hugged her. "I want this night to be perfect for her."

"Yeah about that." Sav interrupted.

"o dear" he said under his breath. Where was his courage now?

"What exactly are you planning?"

"….Um…..um….."

"if you break her heart; I will make your life MISERABLE."

"Sav, I won't I couldn't. She means the world to me.

"Don't mess up like I did with Anya."

* * *

"Trying to control someone like you usually do?" Holly J asked.

"This conversation is between me and my sister." Declan tried to mask his hurt. He still loved holly J; he just went about it the wrong way. She was different than any girl he had been with.

"…..Declan for once, tend to your own business. You should have stayed in Vanderbilt. You weren't missed….trust me." She wiped her eyes as she walked out of the room.

* * *

"I'm sorry about the divorce." K.C. hugged Clare.

"It's fine. Enough about me. How have you been?" Clare asked. K.C. could not believe what he was looking at, a goddess. Her beautiful blue eyes called to him.

"K.C….you ok?"

"Clare? Do you ever wish you could go back in time?"

"Of course. I wish I could go back to a time when my parents were happier."

"That's not what I mean…I'm talking about a time when life was easier….a time where…. Me and you."

"K.C….we have been over this….."

"You still didn't answer. I'll give you time. You are worth the wait." He kissed her cheek. Eli dropped his coffee, disrupting the mistaken moment. Was this a nightmare? Not his St. Clare.

"Clare." Eli turned away.

"It's not what it looks like." K.C. grabbed her wrist.

"Let him go." He tried to kiss her.

"Don't bother." She ran after Eli.

* * *

"Wesley, thanks for coming to the doctor with me. Riley had practice." Anya smiled. Over the past weeks, she learned to enjoy him. He was a little odd, but had a kind heart.

"no problem." He pulled out an issue of Batman.

"I love Batman. He is my all time favorite superhero…well caped crusader."

"I know." Wesley's eyes grew big; Anya giggled he was cute.

"I would have never thought you would like comic book." He said.

"I LARP remember. I have a lot of hidden hobbies." She smiled.

* * *

"How could you be so irresponsible?" Jenna yelled at Fitz. "You knew you had to work….she was just waiting there for an hour."

"First of all. Bianca was late in traffic."

"Do you see Bianca now….she is not exactly the most dependable person! Good thing Kathy knows my number."

"Look, I don't need you to tell me how take of my sister. I'm doing the best I can. It was a accident." Fitz said. He knew he was stupid for trusting Bianca. He was beating himself up enough.

"I'll keep her tonight."

"No you won't. You lost the right to take care of her when you…" He couldn't finish. "Go…now."

* * *

Soft music playing. A chill in the air. Two bodies touching each other. Screams and moans echo in the room. Alli could not have asked for a better lover. He was in tuned to her body. Knowing how to touch her, Dave found places she didn't know had even existed. Dave was cradling her in his arms now. He was tracing patterns on her body. They had to have met before. It was the only explanation he could think of. The way they made love to each other was…..amazing.

"Hey you." She kissed him sweetly.

"Wait" he said crawling out of the bed. "I have one more thing. Close your eyes." He opened the refrigerator grabbing chocolate covered strawberries.

"Open your mouth." He said.

"Um…delicious." She smiled feeding him one.

* * *

"Eli I don't want K.C. I want you. How could you even jump to conclusions after what we just did? I made love to you. I love you only you." Clare exclaimed.

"Then why did you let him kiss you…you didn't try to push him away." Eli argued back.

"Here you go…always have to jump to conclusions."

"What does that mean?" He asked.

"It means that you should trust me…and trust in our love…because I do." She cupped his face, tears streaming in both of their eyes.

"You have no idea how much it hurt to see him touch you Clare." He held her in his arms, laying her on the bed.

"I know, baby." She traced his cheeks.

"Do you want to be with him?"

"No, Eli, I want only you."

"He's not going to stop." He stated. He was not going to give Clare up without a fight. She was his. He was hers. He did was not going to share her with anyone. Clare read his mind.

"Eli…no..don't."

"Ok I won't…I don't want to lose you."


	18. I feel the chemicals kicking in

Today was the day Connor was going to put his plan into motion. Operation: Fenna is on! At 10:45 sharp Fitz and Jenna would cross paths to reach their 3rd hour class. Her 3rd hour happens to be a study period.

"Jenna. Me, Wesley, and Dave are thinking of a song. We think your vocals would be perfect for it." He smiled.

"Connor I haven't sung in a while….but anything for you. Let's go." Connor spotted Fitz down the hallway. Jenna had to admit Connor was acting stranger than usual. She put it in the back of her mind; he was probably trying to make her feel better. He was such a good…..

"Awwww" She screamed as Connor pushed her into Fitz. "I'm gonna kill Connor." She said to herself. Fitz broke her fall as planned.

"Sorry about that Mark." He reluctantly let her go; she ran after Connor.

* * *

"What's your angle?" Declan asked Adam. "Why do you really like my sister? Is this some sick joke to you?"

"Declan I backed down last time, but not anymore. What we have is between us? It is not your place to scrutinize it."

"If you really cared about her, you would leave her be. You two live in a fairy tale world. She's going to go off to college; you'll still be here. She's going to be around "men" her age, with the same values as her. Wake up."

"You might be right Declan, but one thing is for sure."

"What's that?"

"I don't try to control her. She needs me as much as I need her. By the way, I am a lot happier than you." Adam walked off.

* * *

"I am so glad my casts are off." Wesley laughed as he twirled Anya in the music room. He volunteered to be her dance partner. He admired Anya. She was a kind, considerate person. Even though he liked her, he knew where her heart was. It was not like he a chance with her anyways. He was just thankful that she payed him the time of day.

"Me too." She smiled.

"Can I ask you something?" Wesley asked.

"Yeah. Sure."

"Do you still think about Sav?" Anya stopped. Wesley knew he hit a nerve.

"Yes. I do. I miss him so much….but I take it day by day….as they say….it only hurts when I breathe. Wesley then realized that love was not complicated. People made it complicated.

* * *

Alli and Sav were eating lunch in the student council office. They had to catch up on a lot.

"I see you and Holly J called it quits….thank Allah."

"Yeah. I was looking for an out to take my mind off of Anya. I thought by now, I would be over her but I'm not. We both got closure, but …"

"Apparently not, if you still dream about her."

"How did you find out…."

"You talk in your sleep." Alli said.

"How do you do it sis?"

"Do what?"

"Stand up to mom and dad."

"I just do…I want to be happy. Don't you?"

"Yeah…I do."

* * *

"Propmaster Clare." Declan said.

"Declan. You're back. Fiona must be so happy to see you." Clare hugged him.

"Not really. I screwed up big time."

"Sorry about that. Dax this is Eli, my boyfriend." She smiled brightly; Eli shook his hand..

"He is definitely your type. Mysterious, dark….do you still write those vampire fanfictions."

"Yes." Eli rolled his eyes; Clare playfully punched him in the arm.

"So why is Fi mad at you?" They went to the Zen Garden.

"I played the overprotective brother. I tried to talk to her about Adam."

"That's my best friend." Eli stated ready to defend Adam.

"Eli I am not trying to disrespect your friend but, you have to understand where I am coming from."

"…I do…it's just that…it's both of their decision. The world is filled with ignorant people who can what they want to see. From what I see here, you have two choices: see her happiness or see her miserable and angry with you."

* * *

"Connor why did you do that?" Jenna asked angrily.

"Because…"

"Connor, stay out of business. I don't need your help. If I wanted it I would ask." Connor listened to her rant. He was shaking his head. What was the point of paying attention to her?

"I forgot. You only listen to the direct approach…..Fitz likes you, you like him. It's obvious. Everyone can see it. Why do you think Bianca said what she said? For fun? No it's because she wants Fitz happy, but after seeing how you treat him, maybe he doesn't need happiness with you."

* * *

"You are happy today." Fitz took Kathy for a walk in the park.

"Yeah. I got an "A" on my spelling test.

"Good job." He smiled at her. She was so cute.

"Markie, are you and Jenna friends now. Did you make it better?" She looked up at her brother.

"No, I didn't."

"Sometimes you have to be the bigger person. That's what my teacher says."

"I don't know kiddo."

"Have you tried?"

"No"

"I think you should because I said so." Fitz kissed her forehead.

"I'm sorry for leaving you. I promise it will never happen again."

"It's ok" She kissed his cheek. "It was an accident."

* * *

Jenna was lying in the bed crying her eyes out. Why was she doubting herself? Why was she hurting herself like this? Emotional pain is far worse than physical pain. Physical pain can always heal. Fitz was out on his balcony thinking of her as well. It became clear to him. He knew why she was avoiding him: her mom…her dad…her brother, K.C, Drew. Everyone who has ever loved her abandoned her. She pushed him away because she thought he would do the same. Fitz had been with a lot of girls but she was different. She was the only one he ever loved. She was the only one he let Kathy be around. He had to make this right, but how? In times of need call Clare. Jenna woke up from her dream…more like nightmare. She knew what she needed but he was going to leave her anyway. That's her life, everyone leaves.

"Who is this?" She got out of the bed heading to the door. She looked through the peep hole.

"Go away." Her hand was on the door knob. She wanted to let him in but she couldn't.

"No. Let me in."

"Go home Mark."

"Fine." He disappeared. Jenna opened the door making sure he had left.

"You didn't think you got rid of me that easily." He made his way inside. "Come on ex-criminal here." Jenna grabbed him, hugging him. She missed him so much. She didn't realize how much until she held him into his arms. She realized what she was doing, letting him go.

"Why are you here? Don't you get it? I don't want you." Jenna looked at him.

"You expect me to leave, but not anymore. Everyone has left you. I am different." Fitz cupped her face.

"You're lying…I am meant to be alone. That is why I lost the baby." She cried in his arms. She was beating his chest.

"Cry." Fitz tried to coax her.

"No. Let me go. I hate you….I hate you." She let him cradle her. After a moment, she jumped up.

"You should go, seriously,"

"Jenna, are you that hurt? You just let your feelings out and you ask me to leave? Fine. I tried." Fitz followed her to the door. As she opened it, he pushed it back closed. He then turned Jenna around, pushing her against door, trapping her between his arms.

"I love you. Stop putting us through this. I need you so much." Their foreheads touched.

"How do you know? How do I know?" She asked staring at his lips.

"Because.." he kissed her. "You just know." Both of them gave into one another. Fitz could tell she was tense; he rubbed the small of her back. He broke away for air. Her knees buckled; Fitz smiled as he caught her. Picking her up, he took her to the bedroom. Laying her down, his tongue tasted her once more.

"I love you too." Jenna said as Fitz took off his shirt. "Beautiful" she thought.


	19. I wanna run and hide

**THANK YOU ALL FOR REVIEWING. I AM SO HUMBLED THAT YOU ALL ENJOY MY STORY. I NEVER WOULD HAVE THOUGHT IN A MILLION YEARS THAT MY STORY WOULD GET SO MANY REVIEWS. I JUST WRITE BECAUSE I ENJOY DOING IT. THANKS. YOU ALL DO NOT KNOW HOW MUCH IT MEANS TO ME. :)**

"I'm sorry about Declan." Fiona shrugged. "He's just trying to make up for Bobby. It's nothing personal." Adam was in deep thought. Fiona noticed this. She knew something was wrong when he ignored her calls today.

"Fi, yes it is and you know it…..and he's right….its not like we were actually going to last." Adam could see the tears in her eyes. As much as he wanted to ignore Declan's assumption, he knew her brother was right. A pristine young woman like her deserves the real thing, not some crappy imitation.

"What? This doesn't sound like you Adam. What all did he say to you?" Fiona's frustration was visible. She loved Adam, but this was getting old. She wished he would just trust her. They were going round and round. She was getting tired, but she still could not let go.

"Adam, I don't know what you want from me. I try so hard to show you…"

"A relationship is about two people Fiona. I…am…done….We…..are….done." Fiona gasped. Why her? Why was she never good enough? Adam was biting his lips to keep his tears from falling. He told the girl he loved that they were done. This whole relationship was a waste of time. He was crazy to think he was her prince. She would find someone better. He was saving themselves from each other.

* * *

Fitz took his time loving Jenna. He wanted to show her how it felt to really make love. Letting her see a side he didn't even know he had, he let her control the pace. He wanted to badly pound into her; he pushed that thought aside. He wanted her to know how delicate and mild he could be. Jenna closed her eyes, concentrating on how good it felt to be joined with him. Leaving love bites on her neck and chest, he began to quicken his pace. Her screams were music to his ears.

* * *

Sav was pacing back and forth in the hallway, deciding how he was to tell his parents. This was his life. He controlled it. He needed to be happy. He wanted what everyone else had. He wanted to be held and kissed. He wanted someone to argue with over silly things. He wanted Anya. When she told him she was pregnant, his heart stopped. It not only stopped because of distress, he saw his future with Anya. He envisioned Victor Bhandari and Anya McPherson Bhandari.

"Mom..Dad….we need to talk…" He sat down on the couch. He eyed their stern faces, taking a deep breath.

"What is it Savtaj?" His mother asked.

"I can't do this anymore…I can't pretend to be happy…..when I am not."

"How can you not be happy, son? We have given you everything we wished we had at your age." His dad dropped the newspaper he was reading.

"Dad I am not complaining about that. I am talking about what I need. Money can't buy."

"Savtog, please tell me it is not Anya." His mother shook her head. His dad had the same expression.

"Yeah it is. You both know how much I love her. Why do you want me to feel so….alone?"

"Son, you have me, your mother, and Alliah."

"Mom…Dad….i try to be so perfect for you. I can't anymore. This is too much pressure." He got up walking towards the door.

"Where are you going?" His father asked screaming.

"To Anya's" Sav turned the door knob.

"We forbid it." His dad tried to stop him. For the first time, Sav did not care about his parents. He cared about what he wanted, Anya . His parents could not stop him if they wanted to.

* * *

Fitz held her in his arms. They were silent. There was nothing to say. What they both felt was unexplained and unimaginable. Jenna didn't know it could feel that good. She was is in love with Mark Fitzgerald and he her. Kissing her forehead, he asked

"Do you miss Daniel?"

"Every single day. I had always experienced loss, but that loss was…..unlike anything I felt before. It's weird how you can feel alone with another human being inside of you. Then when it's gone, you feel even loner." She laced her fingers with his.

"You don't have to hide anymore. I am here." Fitz said.

"I envy your strength. How do you do it?" She looked into his brown eyes.

"I miss my mom. I wonder everyday where she is. I hope she comes back into me and Kathy's lives and never leaves...I just…..live. Kathy needs me."

"She does. She's a good kid." Jenna smiled.

"She loves you too." Fitz smiled. An idea popped into his head. He realized he never wanted to leave her. It was a living nightmare without her.

"Do you want to move in with me?" He asked.

* * *

As Anya walked into the room, returning from her shower, she nearly screamed when she felt a hand cover her mouth. Reacting on impulse, she punched the invader in the stomach with her elbow.

"Owwwww." Recognizing the voice, she turned around trying to help Sav.

"I am so sorry. What were you thinking….coming in my room unannounced. Not only that, you hid."

"You're the one who knows how to salsa and do karate. What else can you do?"

"A lot." She folded her arms. "Why are you here anyways." All of a sudden, Sav choked. He didn't know what to say. He didn't think this plan fully out.

"Sav, if you don't tell me. I am going to scream my head off." She stated.

"You wouldn't do that." Sav walked up to her, touching her arm. She hated that her body responded to him…only him. Pushing him away, trying to walk to the other side of the room, it was futile. He grabbed her waist kissing her. Anya missed this so much…..wait….was she doing this again?

"Wow…..We are over…..i made that clear." Anya backed away.

"Things have changed. I told my parents that I want…."

"A little to late don't you think."

"Anya. Please don't be like this."

"I'm not being anything but honest. I don't have time for games." Sav left through her window. Did he just say what she think he just said? Could he have chosen her over her parents? Could she possible want him back? Clutching her chest, she wished her feelings would go away. Her loss of his caress was long enduring. Day by day she was learning to deal with it. Now he just comes out of no where with the answer to her prayers. Is this what she really wanted?

* * *

"Are you serious?" Jenna sat up holding the cover over her body. Fitz smiled at her modesty. She wasn't modest 20 minutes ago. He still tasted her on his tongue.

"Yes. You don't have to. It's just that…..when you go away….i miss you." He blushed.

" I never expected you to ask that question…I don't know." She began to babble. Her and Fitz took their relationship to a new level tonight. After this, she could not imagine not being without him. Was it the same for him too?

"I'm sorry. That question was asked on impulse." He frowned. He kicked himself in the head. He finally got her to open up, now she was….

"No." She practically screamed from excitement. "I want this with you….and Kathy. I just want to be stable for her. She is used to people walking in and out of her life."

"like you." He completed. "until now…..please move in with us."

"We could be like a family." She laughed.

"Correction we will be a family." He removed the cover from her body, laying her down once again; soon sleep to over the new found lovers.

* * *

"Thanks for seeing me Holly J." Declan pulled the chair out for her. He invited her to the Dot for a good cup of morning coffee. He wanted to apologize to her. He never had the chance.

"The only reason I came is because I knew you were PAYING." She emphasized.

"I don't usually do this. Apologizing was never really my thing." Declan began.

"Wow you have a way with words." Holly J grabbed her purse leaving the table.

"No don't go. The moment you left. I have…..never been so miserable. I see your face everywhere I look. I know you do too…that's why you went with…Sav." He put his head down.

"…." She looked at his state. Never had he looked so…broken.

"I know I was wrong. The funny part about it is that I don't even know why I do it. Money just seems like…."

"Dax, take it from someone who personally knows about money. It doesn't make problems go away, if anything, it makes them worse."

"HJ, please give me another chance."

"I will think about it." She got up. She gave him no hint of the future. There was no kiss or a hug.

"At least help me be better for Fiona." Declan said.

"That I can do." Holly J walked out leaving Declan to wallow in his sorrow.


	20. It's us that made this mess

**I apologize for not updating. I have been so busy doing essays and community service for clubs. Thank you for being patient.**

**:)**

* * *

Clare closed her eyes, wishing this moment could never end. It was paradise; it was their own little world. Their secret place where only they existed. Eli smiled, looking down at her pale face. It was a Saturday morning tradition. Eli would watch the sunrise with her. This little moment made his problems go away. Clare made everything oppressive go away. Clare knew something was wrong with Eli. Lately, he had been distant. She knew it wasn't another girl because she trusted him. She also knew Eli was the kind of guy who kept his problems to himself because he didn't want to bother her. She didn't push him, but she had to know; she was worried about him. She loved him.

"Eli, what's the matter…lately you've been dark." He raised an eyebrow. "….Than usual."

"I'm fine what do you…."

"…..stop lying to me…" She moved out of his arms. Eli knew she was serious, but he didn't want to put his problems on her. She was happy; her parents' divorce was no longer hurtful to talk about. How could he tell her about his mom?

"Elijah…..please?" She pleaded. How could he not answer her? She was his everything.

"Last Tuesday was the anniversary of my grandfather's death. My mom kinda goes in and out of depression. I don't know what to do?"

"I'm so sorry. I didn't even realize it." She felt like a horrible girlfriend. Eli was always there for her. Now it was her chance.

"It's ok…I didn't want you to worry about me." Eli kissed her hand.

"Its not worrying…it's called helping and loving." She reassured him.

"I've lost so many people in the past…my grandfather, Julia….i don't want my mom to be next. He cried in her arms.

"You won't lose her….I promise." She kissed his forehead.

* * *

"Fiona, I thought I was doing the right thing. I'm sorry." Declan handed her a tissue.

"I don't want anything you touch. Don't you get it? Your eloquence can't make this situation better." She laid her head down. Hours of endless crying was making her head hurt.

"Anyways…you were getting tired of him not trusting you." Declan tried to rationalize.

"I was tired of his insecurities….not his love. Relationships are not black and white."

"Fifi..how can I make things right."

"Apologize….I don't know who is worse, you or mom." She pulled the covers over her head.

"I'm sorry." Declan stated. He was sorry his little sister was sad, but he wanted the best for her. This lifestyle would only lead to tragedy. She finally escaped Bobby's hold on her, now she was under the spell of some "girl."

"Don't even bother saying it until you mean it." Declan didn't understand what true love was. All he cared about was control. Love was all about selflessness. The concept was hard for her to explain to him. She had been calling Adam only to be ignored. What if they weren't meant to be?

* * *

"Thanks so much for helping me pack." Alli and Dave came to help Jenna move in with Fitz. Jenna was so happy. The day has finally come where she would start her life with Fitz and Kathy. What could be better?

"Are you sure you're ready for this, Jenna…I mean moving in with someone is a big step. Alli put newspaper in the glasses.

"I'm sure….Clare." Jenna joked.

"Seriously." Dave stated. "You aren't just moving in with him..but his little sister. You're going to have a lot of obligations."

"When did you become so mature?" Jenna asked.

"It took a little bit of persuasion." Dave looked at Alli.

"I don't even want to know what persuasion you two are talking about." Jenna rolled her eyes.

"I'm ready you guys. Me and Mark have talked about it. I would have never done this if I wasn't expecting to bail." Jenna was labeling the boxes. She didn't realize she had so many items.

"As long as you're happy, we're happy." Alli hugged her.

"When is Fitz gonna come?" Dave playfully ruined the sentimental moment. Jenna punched his shoulder.

"He will be here in a little bit to help." Jenna smiled

* * *

"I already told you Declan…to stay out of my life." Fiona threw a pillow without looking.

"Woah" Anya dodged it. "I'm certainly not Declan." Fiona sat herself up in bed as she sniffled.

"How are you…ok….terrible question…..are you feeling better." Anya tried to make her feel better.

"No…I deserted him." Fiona said.

"Actually…you deserted each other." Anya handed her a quart of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream.

"Thanks….what do you mean?"

"You two were both emotional ping-pong balls. He was running from himself and the world. You were running away from Bobby, your family, and the world too." Anya analyzed.

"I would have been happy with just him though. Adam is worth everything." Fiona put a huge chunk of ice cream in her mouth.

"What did Declan say to him?"

"That I would be moving on with life soon." Fiona sniffled.

"Please don't be mad at me for saying this…but…..Declan does have a point. You will be graduating soon and meeting new people. On the other side your heart knows what it wants..and it's Adam. Why not tell him?"

"I always run after him though. It's his time to come for me." Fiona pouted.

"You're right." Anya nodded her head.

"Do you feel as if you and Sav will grow apart because of life too?" Anya sat up in the chair. The question took her off guard.

"So much has happened….his parents as usual….Holly J."

"But love remains the same." Fiona sounded like a hopeless romantic.

"Love can't keep two people together." Anya stated.

"Judging by the look on your face…I can still tell feelings are involved." Fiona smiled.

* * *

"Eli, you can't keep pushing me away like this." Clare rubbed her hands through his thick black hair.

"I don't do it to be mean. I do it to protect you. I want you happy."

"Eli, I am happy when you are happy." She wiped his tears away.

"My mom means the world to me. I can't imagine life without her. Clare what am I supposed to do. How can I be her strength when I'm not strong myself?"

"You let me be here for you. I will be strong for you." She kissed him.

* * *

"Fitz, you actually bought a U-Haul Truck….Thanks." Jenna blushed. Could this really be happening to her? Could she finally be at peace with herself? Who knew Mark Fitzgerald was her peace?

"Yeah..you can repay me later." He teased her. Jenna couldn't help but notice how good he looked in his wife beater. She was so glad he wasn't self conscious of his body anymore. At least, not around her anyways.

"You can stop staring now." Fitz bent down to pick up the boxes.

"Who says I was looking at you?" Jenna folded her arms.

"You know you want me." Fitz slipped his tongue in her mouth, pushing her against the truck. He backed off smiling with a smugness on his face.

"You are so…..ahhhhhh." She screamed. It was like he knew what to say and what to do. Fitz thought she was the cutest thing when she was aggravated. The way her nose twitched, the way she puckered her lips….everything about her made him feel good. This was right. This was meant to be.


	21. What are you waiting for?

"Alli, we need to talk." Dave sat her down on the park bench. Alli knew this was coming. How could she keep pretending it wasn't? Anya and Sav was their constant reminder. Of course, it would concern Dave.

"Do you think we will end up like them?" Dave grabbed her hand. His eyes were filled with disappointment. She couldn't keep dodging the conversation. Their relationship grew so much.

"Me and Sav are two different people…" Dave put his finger on her mouth to silence her.

"Alli-O it's not a black and white answer. If you say no, it doesn't mean you don't love me. If you say yes, it doesn't mean…." Alli kissed him cupping his face.

"Look, I want you. My family is just going to have to deal with that. Sav handles his problems the way he wants too. Because of that, him and Anya are miserable. No way am I going to let everything we worked for die."

"You make it sound so easy, but they are your family. If given the choice you would choose your family, its only logical." He stated tucking her hair behind her ears. Alli knew he was right but she was fighting with herself. The past months was the happiest she had ever felt. She needed him as much as he needed her. She had to find a medium between him and her parents some way.

* * *

"How is Clare, Elijah?" His mom wiped her eyes with the tissue.

"She's good Mom." Eli handed her the teacup. He hated seeing her like this. He wished he could rewind time where life was simpler for her, but he know he could. He had to face what was in front of her.

"Thank you….Ow." She touched her forehead.

"Head hurting again? Here is some Aleve." Ms. Goldworthy knew Eli was worried. She loved him so much; he was a such a good son. She wanted him happy, but how can you make someone happy when you are not happy yourself. These were the time she wished her father was here. Eli was a reminder of him every day. After her husband left her for another woman, she never thought she had the strength to recuperate. Her dad showed her the way. After he died, her strength died with him

"Eli sit down." She patted the sofa. "I know I haven't been there for you mentally, but I will try better. I love you and you come first in everything."

"Mom its ok. I'm man of the house now. I can care for you…."

"That's not the point son. I am an adult. Children need to stay in children's places. It is not your responsibility." She kissed him on the cheek.

"How about we go fishing…like we did with your grandfather."

"I would really like that mom." He hugged her.

* * *

"Hi Mrs. Bhandari. Is Sav here?"

"Danny. Come in. How is college?"

"It's good. I'm majoring in engineering."

"That is good. Hopefully you do well."

"That's the plan."

"Sav is in his room." Danny walked up the stairs. It had been a minute since he stepped foot in this house. He was back for the weekend so why not visit his best friend. He knocked on the door.

"Mom go away. I have nothing to say to you."

"Is that the way to speak to me." Recognizing Danny's voice he jumped out of the bed and unlocked the door.

"Danny why are you here?"

"I can't come back in town for a weekend? Besides word on the street is that you have be depressed and by the looks at the ice cream and tissues on the floor you have. You are such a chick." Danny came through the door.

"If you knew.."

"Dude I do. Remember I was living the whole situation with you last year." Danny shook his reminiscing of Sav and Anya whirlwind romance.

"What should I do? I tried. She doesn't want me back?"

"She does want you but why would she go back to you? Its not like she has a strong foundation." Sav knew Danny was right.

"What do I do?" Sav asked.

"Try, try, and try again." Danny stated.

* * *

Adam ran his hand over his burn scars. Tears filled his eyes. He lost the only girl who fully understood him because of his pety insecurities. She could get any guy on the planet. Why him? He had so many imperfections.

* * *

"Holly J. How can I make this better?" Declan sat down in on her bed. She didn't know what she wanted. In the beginning, Declan seemed to be her knight in shining armor. Soon the things she once loved about him became the things she disliked. Sav was less complicated; she felt so stupid for trying the casual with him. It was only natural feelings would get involved.

"You know exactly what you need to do. Think about Fiona for once." Holly J exclaimed.

"What changed your tune? Fiona told me you were against their relationship too." Declan asked.

"Look…..Fiona likes Adam. There is nothing anyone can do about it. Let them be happy, because…." Holly J turned her head.

"Because we can't be." Declan finished.

"Declan I honestly don't know."

* * *

"Peter come on. You have to study." Darcy shakily said enjoying Peter kissing her neck.

"I am studying…Anatomy." Peter returned to kissing her. Every since Darcy returned from Africa, he couldn't stay away from her. She was everywhere. She was the one. He had always known since they were in high school. He had fallen for her since the "my room" pictures. Everything just worked out perfectly.

"Seriously, though, we both have to pass this history test. I took the liberty of making flashcards. Mr. Bostick also gave me a practice exam." Darcy smiled.

"Someone has a crush on a teacher." Peter stated.

"No. I have what I want right in front of me." She kissed him as she walked to the bathroom. This gave Peter ample to write a question on a blank card.

* * *

"Sav. We can't do this…..Holly J" Anya said trying to break Sav's kiss.

"I'm sorry but I can't stop myself." Sav kissed her neck, sucking on a pulse point. "I don't want her, I want you." Why did she let him in her room again? She knew this was going to happen? She didn't want to stop it. Now she was on her bed with Sav kissing her.

"I don't care anymore about my parents. You gave me all of you and I give you all of me." Anya looked in his eyes. His beautiful eyes that always stopped her heart. She sat up catching her breath. Combing through her hair with her fingers she looked at him.

"I want to believe you so bad, I want you so bad. I dream about you everyday Sav…" Sav rubbed her back up to down calm her nerves.

"Anya things are going to be different. I won't let you down again." He kissed her eyes, nose, cheek, slowly laying her back down. Taking her shirt off, he looked into her eyes.

"Are you sure you want this?" Sav began touching her.

"Yes. I am." She closed her eyes enjoying his touch.

* * *

"Ok.. back to flash cards." Darcy stated aloud. Peter smiled at her beauty, her grace. She was not going to expect this as a study question?"

"Ahhhhhhh" She screamed. Darcy didn't realize how she was reacting. All she knew was that she was reading this card in her hand that determined her future with Peter.

"Will you marry me?" Darcy re read it. Peter was fully aware of what he was asking her. He was ready to start a family with her, of course, after they both finished school. Now that he had her back, there was no way he was going to let her go. This was his claim on her and his love for her.

"Darcy. I know what you're think. We can get married after college, but I know you are the one for me and I know you know I am the one for you. I see it in your eyes when you look at me and when you're mad at me. Please be mine. I can't imagine my life without you and only you." Darcy wanted this so bad but was she ready for this commitment? It wasn't like she could use her parents as a model for successful marriage.

"Peter…. I don't know what to say….i mean…..my parents….you and me….i love you so much though. I don't want to lose you again. This feels right though, I love you….I love you…. Yes. Yes. I will marry you." She jumped into Peter's arms kissing him.

"Darcy Edwards Stone, has a nice ring to it." He returned the kiss.


	22. We both can't fight it

**I am so sorry for taking so much time to upload. Life can be hectic at time. College, homework, and pledging a sorority lol :) I have not forgotten about this story. Thank you all for reviewing and adding me to your "Fave Author" and/or "Fave Story" lists.**

**And Now What You All Have Been Waiting on**

**Animal **

**Chapter 22**

**We Both Can't Fight it**

**...**

Declan had never felt like this before. He was at rock bottom. He lost his sister and the girl who he ever loved. The sad part was, it was his entire fault. His stubbornness and arrogance dug him in a hole he could not get out of. He thought he was doing good by them, he thought it was what Fiona wanted….correction…it was what he wanted for her. She is his sister, of course he wanted the best for her. Her life was hard as it is now; he didn't want it to be any harder. Holly J was like champagne to him, sophisticated and refined. That is what attracted him to her at first, but it all changed because of him. His love was control. He had to make amends, not so they could benefit, but so he could as well.

…...

"Clare, she's getting so much better." Eli kissed her forehead. He loved how her pale skin looked in the moonlight. That was why he took her to their secret place in the woods. The stars glowed as did she. Both lying on the hood of the car, they bathed in each other's presence. Clare laced her fingers in his. Eli never thought he would be in this place. He thought he would have either his mom or Clare. Now, he has both.

"What are you thinking about?" Clare looked up at him.

"I'm thinking about how I have two amazing women in my life, I never thought I would have. When I was with my mom, she finally opened up about my grandpa. She was trying to protect me. She wanted me to be happy."

"Of course, she is your mom. You are her son. She wants the best for you. I do too." She pecked his lips…well, intended too. Before she knew it, Eli embraced her into a passionate kiss. He couldn't help himself around Clare. She was his everything. Without her, his life did not exist.

"Ever wanted to make love in the woods?" He smirked, removing her shirt.

….

Adam continued to stare at his phone, hoping Fiona would call him. He knew it would never happen. She always came after him. But he needed to be out her life, he didn't fit in. He couldn't make her completely happy. But if that is the case, why are they both unhappy? Why does he always end up hurting her? He ran his fingers over his lips, remembering how her kiss was. Why can't he let himself be happy?

"Still wallowing in self-pit I see." Drew bolted in the door. He knew he was harsh but his brother needed tough love right now.

"Why are you so…"

"Because you need to hear it little brother. Its obvious she's into you. What's holding you back, really? I can't be about who you really are. That didn't stop you from going after Bianca."

Adam dropped his head in defeat. "The minute me and Fi got together. Things started changing for her. The stares, words said behind her back….all because of me. It's not fair. Why her? I can handle it. I'm use to the ridicule and constant backstabbing. Not her." Tears fell from his eyes.

"You underestimate her strength Adam. She doesn't care about everyone else, just you." Drew walked out.

…

As she thought about all the good Declan did for her, she couldn't put the bad past her. She felt so caged when she was with him. Sav was her outlet, but now he was gone. She wasn't bitter, him and Anya deserved one another. She, herself, wasn't so good either. She had a known mean streak. She took pride in evoking fear of those who crossed her path. It gave her a sense of power, but she was lacking something. Did she really love Declan or what he could do for her? She was so confused. Pacing around in her room, she decided to look through her pictures on her computer. They both looked so happy, she was happy at the time. What was the matter with her? Where did this void all of a sudden from? How could she get rid of it?

….

Eli loved being inside of her. They were connected mentally and physically. It was as if they were the only two human beings on the planet. She was his home. Her screams, he would never get tired of. She was his. Only his. She loved how he touched her. No one man has ever made her feel beautiful and sexy. She couldn't help but to scream at the way he was making her feel. Were they destined to be together? Yes they were.

…...

"So what would you do if I told you I loved you?" Alli plopped herself under Dave feeding him the popcorn. She was so glad her parents went on their 20th Anniversary vacation. She never vocalized Dave was her boyfriend, but both of her parents had common sense. Her father would always give them a disapproving stare, but she did not care. She would defy her parents for the wrong reasons. She was running from their perfect expectations. No she had good reason to run. Dave was a blessing to her. With him, she was running towards freedom.

"I would say I was the luckiest man ever." He put his arm around her as she laid her head on his chest. He was holding a strong woman in his arms. To go against her culture and her parents' wishes blew his mind away. It wasn't a dream; she does love him.

"In la la land, I see David." She teased.

"No…its… just that…you are giving up everything up for me. I want you to make sure you know what you are doing." He kissed her hand.

"You don't think I'm making the right decision?" She muted the tv.

"As I said before, there is no right or wrong answer. I want you happy. I don't want you to feel forced." Alli listened to his response. She cupped his face.

"That's why you have been looking sad lately. You think its your fault. This has more to do with you. My parents need realize that love can't be tamed. It's not something that can be arranged."

"What about Sav and…"

"Dave Sav was attracted to her, but he loves Anya. Just like me. It took me a while but I succumbed to your "charming" ways." She kissed his nose.

"Just remember Alli, I want you with the best because you deserve it. You weren't my first but you were the first one I ever loved. That was why it was so hard for me to show you affection. I was so scared because the feelings I have now, I know they won't go away. I was so scared you were going to leave me." Alli said nothing but smiled. She grabbed his hand, guiding him to her bedroom.

…...

"Adam, what are you doing…" She didn't even finish the sentence as he pushed her to her couch with his mouth on hers. With anger she pushed him off trying to catch her breath.

"How dare you Adam. How dare you come to house in the middle of the night and kiss me like nothing even happened." She folded her arms. "How did you get here anyways? You didn't walk did you?"

"Is that concern?" Fiona rolled her eyes. "I took a cab."

"Is it outside still so you can leave?" She retorted back.

"I deserve that Fi but I have my reasons. You are different from any girl I have liked in the past that is why I love you so much. When I love someone I try to protect them from myself."

"And you think that makes it better. I have spent countless hours trying to wrap the fact that I don't need this in my life right now. I'm finally mentally stable and you just drop me. I thought…. I don't know what I thought." She glided down the wall, holding herself. Her curls framed her face perfectly.

"No, no. You did nothing wrong. It's all my fault. I didn't know I had put you through all of this. I hurt both of us. I'm sorry Fifi. Please forgive me. I want another chance. I need another chance." She said nothing as he hugged her while pulling her up off the floor.

"You don't have to say anything, just know from now on…I'm here for you."

…...


	23. Why can't you understand

**Animal **

**Chapter 23**

**Why Can't You Understand**

...

Another unanswered phone call. The caller, her father. Better known as Robert. At least, that's what she calls him. A father is man who is strong and protective of his family. He was none of those things. The minute things started going great in her life, he tries to come back. She would not allow it. Fitz was always observant to her needs, he knew something was wrong. She knew she was going to have to tell him, but now was not the time. Though she knew a part of her would always care for her father, she was afraid to face him. She would have to face him eventually. She would have to tell him everything. He probably wouldn't care. Why do children always have to have their parents' approval? Her mind being preoccupied, she accidently bumped into someone.

"Hey buddy." Marisol hugged her. "I tried calling you, but you never answered."

"Sorry, I'm having complications with my phone." She lied.

"O, that's ok. You look good. I mean you and Fitz must be…"

"We are." Jenna smiled thinking of her Mark. "Look I'll catch up with you later. No flirting with random guys ok."

…

Mr. Bhandari knew what he was doing was morally wrong, but he knew the outcome of his children's current actions. They would hate him for what he was about to do, but that would only be for now. They will thank him later. His children deserved the best. Life was hard enough, why make it any harder? Some people saw him as over protective. He saw himself as a good father. He had to talk to Anya and Dave alone. He only hoped he could push them away from His children.

"Hey Dave." Anya hugged him.

"Hey, Anya, meeting Sav."

"Actually….yes….he told me to meet him her." Anya smiled.

"I got the same one from Als. Maybe we are double dating?" They were so naïve. He was watching them in the background at The Dot. He snuck into Alli and Sav's room that morning to steal their phones. He knew they would never notice because they are always in a rush at mornings. It would not be the first time they left them behind. He sent a text 10 minutes ago that said "Meet me at the dot."

As Anya and Dave were sitting waiting on their loves. They were surprised to see Mr. Bhandari walk to their table. Anya literally paled. She knew that look, he did not have to say a word. Anya was not scared anymore. She knew how to handle the situation. Sav was giving up everything for her; he finally made her his prize.

"Can we talk outside? I think the setting is mostly preferred." As her turned her back to them, they began to walk. Dave was scared. As of lately, he was able to stand up for friends and ex-boyfriends, but not a parent. He eyed Anya. She only mouthed the words "Stand strong. Don't let him scare you." Dave was so glad he could read lips.

…...

"You can't keep ignoring the calls." Fiona took a bite of her sandwich.

"I know, but I'm so angry with him." Jenna said sitting on the picnic table.

"You have the right to be angry with him, but he is still you father." Clare rationalized.

"He is a part of you no matter what, we can't choose our parents." Alli said. Jenna was so glad she had regained her friend's trust. It was times like these she needed them. It was times like these where she knew they would be there for her. Lunch time wasn't going to be long enough to talk about this. Luckily, they all decided to skip next period.

Marisol looked at the beautiful girls at the picnic table. They all had something she didn't have: strength, happiness, beauty, and friendships. Her life over the past months had gone downhill. Chantay had kicked her off the power squad because of their differences. She also lost her so-called friends. They only hung out with her because she was soon to be popular. Was that the kind of person she was? A superficial follower with no mind of her own who needed attention from men. She didn't want this for herself.

Alli knew her friend needed her, but she couldn't overlook Marisol at the other table. She recognized that look. She was lost and scared. She was just a freshman who needed guidance. There were no hard feelings for her flirtations. Marisol needed friends too.

"Earth to Als." Fiona waved a hand over her face.

"Maybe we should invite Marisol over here." She explained. "She looks like a lost puppy."

"That is a good idea Bhandari. I need to change the subject. We can talk later at the Dot." Jenna stated. Alli waved at her and Marisol happily obliged.

"Are you sure it's ok if I sit here?"

"Yeah. Positive." They smiled at her.

…...

Dave felt like he was behind enemy lines. There three of them were, sitting down outside "The Dot." To the outside world, they looked calm. They just didn't know. Mr. Bhandari crossed his legs and folded his fingers.

…...

"Jenna, I think you should do what you want to do. We couldn't blame you either way you decided to react. Keep in mind, you have to be able to deal with the consequences." Marisol concluded as she hugged Jenna.

"I just don't want you to regret anything." Clare said. Jenna listened to their advice. She knew they meant well. The decision was up to her. She wanted to talk to Fitz about it but she didn't want him to worry. He finally learned how to balance his school and work schedule. Kathy was also much happier with her there too. As of lately when she frowned she would always ask if she wanted to leave. Jenna did not mean to give her that idea.

"I just don't know what im supposed to do. " Clare rubbed her back.

"What did Fiz say?" Alli asked.

"I didn't tell him. Please don't say a word to him. VAULT." Jenna declared. They each replied under oath. As the bell rang, Marisol gathered her things.

"Sorry guys, I cant skip Biology. I txt you." She smiled.

"Speaking of phones, I left mine at home again. Ughhhhh." She hit her hand against her head.

"We'll see you later then." Clare smiled. "To the dot we go." They all piled into Fiona's car.

…...

"I am only going to say this once. I want each of you to stay away from Alliah and Savtog. They are fine young teenagers who are destined for greatness. They do not need distraction to influence their judgments." He said sternly.

"Why because weren't not Indian." Anya snapped.

"Do not try to belittle my values."

"Do not expect us to understand your ignorant statements." Dave replied.

"I thought a parent was supposed to put their childs happiness first. You are so controlling. No wonder why Sav and and Alli lash out. You suffocate them. You don't see how your hurting your children?"

"I do not care about the present, but the future. Stay away from them both."

"No. I can't do that. Alli wants me in her life. Sav wants Anya in his. We're not running away from you. It won't work. They will never forgive you for this."

"That is not for you to say, but my children can do so much better than you two."

…...

As Alli stepped out of Fiona's car, the first thing she noticed was her Dad, Anya, and Dave. What was going on? That was a rhetorical question. Of course she knew what was going on. He was at it again. Why can't he just stay out of her life?

…...

As he stood up to walk away, Dave caught his attention. He saw Alli walking up behind him furious at the world.

"You can say what you want, but you can't stop me from seeing Alliah." Dave got up.

"Sav's not going to give up on me either."

"We'll see about that." Mr. Bhandari laced his voice with intimidation.

"No dad we won't." Alli said. Dave kissed her forehead as he walked out with Anya.

"What are you doing here on a school day?" How dare he ask her that question as if he were in the right? He was conniving and manipulative. He was turning out to be the exact opposite of what she thought him to be. Alli knew her father was against their relationships but this was too much.

"I was helping a friend. I see you're trying one of your tactics." Alli folded her arms. Her father hated to see the look of discouragement and anger in her eyes.

"I can't keep doing this. Living up to your rules Dad. Its killing me and Sav. Cant you see?"

"When me and your mother came from India, he had such vision for you."

"And that's good. I have vision for myself but you have to accept Dave is a part of it." Alli walked off. She remembered this was not why she was here. Jenna needed her. She didn't care what her father did from now on. She just removed him from her train of thought.

…...

Sav decided to stay in the Student Council Room to finish his heart-to-heart talk with Eli. He was abusing his authority but he really didn't care. He offered Eli a drink.

"Thanks. So how are you and Anya."

"Things could be better…not between us…but my family. At first I wanted her to stay away from me because of my family. Now I want her to stay away from me because I think im making her life miserable. She deserves someone with a family who adores her. She's beautiful, kind, smart. Why does she want me?" Eli was listening to him ramble.

"Because you are you. You have to look at it like that. You have something others don't have."

"My father has made it obvious that he doesn't want her around. She still acts the same. Shes just happy that I am showing her as mine." Sav continued filing papers.

"Then that's all that matters." Eli put the top back on his drink.

"You don't know my father. He is stubborn. Once he sets his mind to something, he never quits. I could never forgive myself if he did something to hurt her."

…...


	24. What Are You Waiting For pt 2

**Animal **

**Chapter 24**

**What Are You Waiting For**

***Thank you everyone for still reading and reviewing and adding me as your "fave author" and also adding my stories to your "Fave Stories" list. You all have no idea what it means to me.**

**:) Hugs and kisses 3**

**...**

Anya walked briskly down the hall, unconsciously wiping her eyes as she made her way to the bathroom. Why was she still crying? You would think she would be used to his family's disapproval by now. She didn't think Mr. Bhandari would have the nerve to confront and try to humiliate them the way he did. Should she tell Sav? As she looked in the mirror, she began to wet paper towels to wipe her mascara. She soon heard a flush as the number one person she did not want to see came out of the stall to wash her hands…Holly Jeanette Sinclaire.

"What happened to you?" Holly J handed her a paper towel.

"I don't need it." Anya cut her off, trying to apply some powder.

"Anya, seriously, I come in peace.." Anya hesitantly accepted the towel. "I take it things aren't going good in "Sanya Town."

"Ok, Holly J. Get to your freaking point." She angrily threw her make-up in her bag, putting her hand on her hip. Was today the day she was going to release her anger out on one person. Holly J was the perfect target. Holly J could tell Anya was mad. She had never seen her like this. She always admired how Anya seemed to just roll with the punches and never give up. I guess everyone came to a boiling point.

"I'm sorry Anya. Really…. You should be used to my dry humor by now."

"I couldn't get used to it, that's why we're not friends anymore."

"I know…I know….what I am trying to ask is…is everything ok?"Holly J played with her pearls.

"No…..long story short…..Mr. Bhandari…..made it very clear he wants nothing more than for Sav to find someone else of Muslim decent."

"You've never given up before, and besides Sav doesn't care what he says. Are you going to tell him?"

"No." Holly J looked at Anya crazily. "I know I should but I can't. I mean, their relationship is on the rocks now because of me."

"Anya that's his choice. Sav is a good guy. He is going to do what he thinks is best for you." She rubbed Anya's back.

…...

Fitz angrily as he threw his French book in his locker. He had a lot of things on his mind, like Jenna. Her smile was starting to fade. He knew she was happy with Kathy and him, but why would she not tell him what was going on? He didn't see Eli and Owen walking up to him. It still blew the whole entire school's mind how they had become friends.

"I take it French is kickin your ass?" Owen raised an eyebrow?

"No…..its Jenna." Fitz admitted.

"I thought you guys were good?" Eli asked. He was in shock because Clare usually told him everything. By the way Fitz looked, there was static.

"Jenna doesn't know that I know this, so please don't tell her…but, her dad has been trying to meet up with her?" Fitz explained.

"No wonder why she has been out of it." Eli said.

"Clare didn't tell you about?" Fitz asked. Eli shook his head. "It's probably because she didn't know it herself. Jenna likes to keep everything to herself. She doesn't want to be a bother, but we live together. Shouldn't I deserve to know?" Owen shook his head. This boy had it bad. He kind of envied it. It must be nice to have someone who cares for you because of who you were, not because you're a football player.

"Just talk to her about it. Jenna's main concern is that you and Kathy are both happy." Eli reassured.

"You are right, but I am the man. I am supposed to look out for her. That's my job." Fitz zipped his backpack up.

"O my gosh Owen. I am so sorry." Marisol apologized. "I had my head in my book. I didn't mean to bump into you."

"It's no problem frosh." Owen smiled noticing how cute she was.

"Ummmm…..the name's Marisol." She politely corrected him. He was cute and usually she would flirt back, but she needed to better herself. She didn't want to get a bad reputation.

"Well I'll see you later….Marisol." Owen smirked.

"Maybe or….. maybe not." She walked away. Okay, so old habits are hard to break as she smiled to herself.

"Seems like you found your girl." Fitz smiled.

…..

Jenna just took in the scene as she watched Alli yell at her father. This was a sign she had to stay away from him. Years of bottling an emotion does wonders to a person. She knows she's not ready to see him.

"Hey." Fiona called her attention at the table. "Don't let that influence your choice. Remember we all decide how we handle a situation."

"I don't know Fi. When I look at him, I see myself. We have the same ways…..personality and mannerisms." Jenna sipped her water. "What if it makes me want to run away from Fitz and Kathy."

"Jenna that's croc and you know it. You've grown in more ways than one. You always have time. This decision is something you have to make. Ignoring your phone isn't going to make it go away." Clare stated. Alli walked up to the table sitting down as if nothing happened.

"You're right. Thanks for being here guys." Jenna smiled.

"Of course." Alli held her hand.

"Spill Bhandari." Fiona stated. "You can't exactly be happy after a scene like that."

"I'm not but that's what he wants." Alli simply said.

"Parents suck?" Jenna asked.

"I came to the conclusion that parents are just as clueless as we are when it comes to life. They do the best they can or what they think is best to do. Sometimes, though, they want what is best for them." Clare drank her lemonade.

"And there is nothing you can do about it." Alli and Jenna cried.

…

"Dave did you get the Fundraising Budget ready?" Dave was unresponsive to Sav. His fears were starting to reemerge, he was making his life harder for her; but if he didn't have her in his life, he was making life harder for him and her. Was he too selfish? Should he tell Sav or let Alli tell him. He knew Anya wouldn't. He got so flustered he dropped the file folder in on the floor.

"Dammit," he cursed as he picked up the papers. Sav watched him play out his hostility on the papers.

"Okay, Dave, what s the matter?"

"Nothing. Just drop it." Dave closed the cabinet.

"If it has something to do with my sister, then I have a right to know."

"If you mean is a future turner on the way….then no…everything's fine."

"Will you stop stalling? I am asking you…man to man, what is going on."

"Two words…your father."

…..

"Mark you had no right." Jenna put her backpack down as the trio entered the apartment. Kathy went to her room. She didn't like seeing Jenna like this…it scared her. What if she left them?

"Jenna calm down." He held her at arm's length. "I did it because you need to talk to him. I don't want you to be like me or Kathy…wonder everyday where you come from and not have the answers."

"I know that but still, you should have told me you talked to him." She folded her arms.

"Jen, you should have told me he was trying to contact you. I thought we said we were going to be 100% honest with each other."

"I was going to tell you…it's just that…I don't want to see him." She sat down as he handed her a coke.

"Babe…at least you can make things better. Aren't you curious?" Fitz sat next to her. "When I was little I always imagine my dad to be superman. I thought he would swoop me and kath…"

"And take you two back to Krypton." She joked.

"…Yeah." He laughed. "Do this for yourself." He kissed her leaving her alone to get ready for work. Thinking about his words, she went to Kathy's room.

"Hey princess." She looked at the little girl color.

"Are you going to leave us?"

"No….no…never…this has nothing to do with you. Any argument we have is never about you ok?" The little girl nodded.

"Are you going to see your Daddy?"

"….Yeah."

"I think you should…I wish I could meet mine, but I have Fitz…and though he is not my dad…he is like one." Kathy smiled. Jenna smiled at the wise girl.


End file.
